Stoffa: Why is reality TV all about how terrible life can be?

Gabriel Stoffa

What is going on with television? Why is reality TV so damn popular?

I’ve never cared for most “reality” TV programming, partly because of how scripted a lot of it is but mostly because I don’t understand the allure of watching people you could meet down the street play out their day.

On Wednesday, my roommate, Jason “The Wolf” Danielson, declared there is a show he has to check out because people have been talking about it. The Wolf likes reality TV. He likes other TV as well but watches more reality TV than I think is healthy; a healthy amount being next to zero watching in my opinion.

He had recorded “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo,” which is a spin-off of “Toddlers and Tiaras.” It is a show about the oddities of the redneck Thompson/Shannon family living in McIntyre, Ga. Due to Wolf’s constant sarcasm, I’m never quite certain if he is joking about wanting to watch a program or not; for the record, I don’t think he was joking this time. As I am a curious bastard, I watched the episode.

I can say, after 10 minutes of viewing, “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” is one of the worst reality TV shows, or any shows ever, to appear on television.

The lives and choices of the family involved are so atrocious I would prefer to watch those PETA videos of animals being slaughtered.

Its fourth episode had 3 million viewers, up from its 2.3 million the previous week. It was watched by more people than the Republican National Convention. More people want to watch slack-jawed yokels than get information about a man competing for the most powerful office in the world. Ugh. The 18 to 49 demographic is what is pushing this show over the top, according to numbers from E! Online.

Come on people, especially all of us under the age of 50. I’ve watched a lot of TV and movies where terrible and horrible things happen and where people are mercilessly insulted or degraded, but I don’t want to see real people in those situations as a form of entertainment.

“Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” is exploiting a family that has serious problems.

At one point in the show, I looked over to Wolf to tell him I needed to call protective services to report the Thompson/Shannon family in the show, and not just because I consider those child pageants to be akin to abuse.

One of the daughters feeds her three-thumbed baby Mountain Dew in its bottle. If anyone remembers back in January, a lawsuit was filed against PepsiCo when a man claimed to have found a mouse in his Mountain Dew. Pepsi said it wasn’t possible because the mouse would have been turned into a “jelly-like” substance.

That’s right, a newborn baby is being fed a caffeinated, sugary-packed substance that turns things to jelly. And this is what people are watching on TV.

I am the pot calling the kettle black, given my love of raunchy celebrity roasts, stand-up comedy and the film “The Aristocrats,” but I seriously doubt the Thompson/Shannon family understood, while they were being filmed, the degree to which their portrayal would be made fun of by the rest of the nation. I imagine they realize now, though.

Why oh why is this the sort of entertainment people are flocking to?

I caught the new Jimmy Fallon sitcom “Guys with Kids,” which is basically a bunch of recycled jokes, characters and situations from every successful sitcom but with about as much allure as Ashton Kutcher‘s “Two and a Half Men.” As bad as it is, it should not offend your senses as much as “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.” Yet I’ll bet dimes to dollars “Guys with Kids” receives worse ratings.

Apparently what oodles of Americans desire is for a town of under 700 people, with 40 percent living under the poverty level according to 2010 Census and well behind the curve for modern living, to be ridiculed week after week. I’m looking down on the family, and at the same time trying not to. That is how much this show pollutes the mind.

The show isn’t bringing to light some sad situation we can work to remedy. No one is going to “help” the people there, nor is it clear the people there want any form of “help.”

So I ask: Why continue showing the train wreck?

All I can think is people are so unhappy with large portions of their lives that what makes them feel better is seeing how others have it worse. I don’t know about you, but when I think about that, I feel kind of sad.

I know my words won’t initially stop you from watching, and in all likelihood I’ve incited a few folks out there to tune in next week, but I ask everyone to please, please consider how what you are watching on reality TV is really rotten when it comes to entertainment. “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” is right in line with the old adage: “Television will rot your brain.”

Not a lot of TV is actually very good when it comes down to critical evaluation, but why continue encouraging these spin-off shows lacking any form of content other than seeing the depressingly odd or outlandish standards of life some people exist in?

If you want tragedy and oddity, watch the news. At least then you might learn about a few things affecting your life.