Be considerate, use common sense

Wendy Sloan

Adjusting to living in a residence hall and sharing a room is a big adjustment and sometimes a concern for incoming freshmen. Roommate experiences can range from wonderful to downright awful. From the tight quarters to the community showers and late-night study habits, it is not uncommon for people to be anxious about this part of college.

“Everyone is afraid, but most of the time roommates get along and things go smoothly,” said Barton’s Tappan House Community Adviser Joshua Bruecken, junior in management. To ease some of the anxiety, there are proactive steps people can take to make this transition smoother.

First, incoming freshmen need to remember everyone comes from a different background, Bruecken said. It is important for people to try to understand other people’s situations and learn to empathize and accommodate their roommates.

As a community adviser, a part of Bruecken’s job is to be available to help solve roommate conflicts or violations. Based on his experience in the position, he said he can’t overemphasize the importance of communication between roommates.

Often a roommate conflict can occur because one party is unaware that something is an issue.

Freshmen can expect to have issues with space, said Elizabeth Antol, senior in accounting. “Dorm rooms are small, so they will have to get used to not being able to throw their stuff wherever and just leave it.”

Antol is an only child, so she had never shared a room before coming to Iowa State. “Getting used to sharing a room can definitely be an adjustment,” she said.

Coming into a new situation like this, Bruecken said freshmen should remember to use common sense and be considerate.

Antol said people need to treat their roommates the way they’d want to be treated. For her, a big part of that is to respect your roommate if they need to study. “Either be quiet or leave the room for a while,” she said.

Cleaning up after yourself is important.

“Don’t leave your stuff all over the room; there is not enough space for that,” Antol said.

If at all possible, Bruecken said future roommates should contact each other the summer before school starts, either by phone or via Facebook.

“Get to know them,” he said. “People will tell you a lot about themselves if you talk to them.”

Antol agreed. “You should absolutely contact your roommate before you move in. It gives you a chance to get to know them a little bit, and you can discuss what things you have that you’ll bring for the room and what they have,” she said.

Antol did not have the best experience in the residence halls her freshman year.

She did not know her roommate prior to moving in.

They never took the time to get to know each other or set boundaries of any kind.

“We were complete opposites and just didn’t mesh well,” she said.

Freshmen should not let Antol’s experience discourage them from choosing a random roommate for their first year at Iowa State.

Bruecken also had a complete stranger as his roommate when he was a freshman. In contrast to Antol, Bruecken said they are really good friends now.

He said incoming freshmen should opt to have a complete stranger as a roommate.

“When you move in, talk to your roommate about general rules that you want followed, like quiet hours when one of you needs to study, things like that,” Antol said.

Antol remembered filling out a roommate agreement plan at the beginning of the semester.

“Filling that out should help with a lot of possible issues,” she said.

Some residence halls require roommates to fill out roommate agreement plans while others do not, Bruecken said. It all depends on where you decide to live.

However, if a hall doesn’t require it, residents can always request one to fill out.

When you live in a small space with another person, disagreements are bound to occur.

However, there are steps freshmen can take to make these disagreements easier on both parties.

Antol said that when a problem arises, people should talk to their roommates about it immediately.

Bruecken said residents should talk to their community adviser.

“No one really uses us,” Bruecken said. “But we’re here to help out; that’s what we’re trained to do.”

If these methods do not work for residents, they can always look into switching roommates at the semester break. Bruecken said this is usually a “last-ditch option.”