Katie Koestner, sexual assault survivor and prevention activist, delivered a harrowing message about the consequences and misconceptions of date rape to ISU students.

Koestner urged both men and women to combat rape in her presentation to the 250 audience members who gathered Wednesday in the Great Hall of the Memorial Union.

“A rape happens on a college campus every 21 hours. What would you do for a day without rape?” she asked. “Respect — that is what you need to do. Will the men here who don’t like rape please do something about it?”

Koestner said after she was assaulted while she was at college, her life changed.

“When I was young, I had dreams about what I was going to do with my life, but that is all gone now,” she said. “That is why I am lecturing about rape today.”

Koestner talked about some mistaken perceptions about date rape.

“Most often people think that the rapist is a stranger. They think that rape happens when a stranger grabs a woman out of the dark,” she said.

Koestner said she was raped her freshman year at the College of William and Mary in Williamsburg, Va. After a period of “hanging out” with one of the men she met in her dorm, Koestner said he raped her in her room after they went on a date.

“I was naive,” she said. “You think that you can be alone in a room with someone you like without having sex. I liked him. I don’t want you to forget that.”

When Koestner saw her attacker the next day, he told her that she didn’t look well, and offered to help her back to her room, where he raped her again.

Koestner decided that she was not going to tell anyone what happened. “I thought that if you never tell anyone, they don’t take sides,” she said.

When Koestner finally told people about her experience, she said she wasn’t given much support.

The nurse at the student health center offered her sleeping pills, and the dean told her to go home and sleep because she was upset and making serious accusations, she said.

The worst blow came when Koestner told her dad. He was sympathetic until she told him that she invited her attacker into her room.

“My dad told me that I was not supposed to have boys in my room, and the phone line went dead,” she said. “My dad has never been to hear me speak.”by Kim Claussen

Iowa State Daily

Katie Koestner, sexual assault survivor and prevention activist, delivered a harrowing message about the consequences and misconceptions of date rape to ISU students.

Koestner urged both men and women to combat rape in her presentation to the 250 audience members who gathered Wednesday in the Great Hall of the Memorial Union.

“A rape happens on a college campus every 21 hours. What would you do for a day without rape?” she asked. “Respect — that is what you need to do. Will the men here who don’t like rape please do something about it?”

Koestner said after she was assaulted while she was at college, her life changed.

“When I was young, I had dreams about what I was going to do with my life, but that is all gone now,” she said. “That is why I am lecturing about rape today.”

Koestner talked about some mistaken perceptions about date rape.

“Most often people think that the rapist is a stranger. They think that rape happens when a stranger grabs a woman out of the dark,” she said.

Koestner said she was raped her freshman year at the College of William and Mary in Williamsburg, Va. After a period of “hanging out” with one of the men she met in her dorm, Koestner said he raped her in her room after they went on a date.

“I was naive,” she said. “You think that you can be alone in a room with someone you like without having sex. I liked him. I don’t want you to forget that.”

When Koestner saw her attacker the next day, he told her that she didn’t look well, and offered to help her back to her room, where he raped her again.

Koestner decided that she was not going to tell anyone what happened. “I thought that if you never tell anyone, they don’t take sides,” she said.

When Koestner finally told people about her experience, she said she wasn’t given much support.

The nurse at the student health center offered her sleeping pills, and the dean told her to go home and sleep because she was upset and making serious accusations, she said.

The worst blow came when Koestner told her dad. He was sympathetic until she told him that she invited her attacker into her room.

“My dad told me that I was not supposed to have boys in my room, and the phone line went dead,” she said. “My dad has never been to hear me speak.”