Yep, we cannot believe it either. The humor section is officially coming to an end. No longer will these hard hitting, gut wrenching totems for comedic outreach be dropping into your pretty little mailboxes each Sunday at 12:00 pm, 2:00 pm or that one time it was 1:00 pm. Well, I guess we never really figured that out, but that is beside the points now. 

 

But who is to blame? How could this titan of a section be taken down in such a drastic fashion? The truth is, we have no idea where our editor Omar is.

 

Born November 25, 1965, Omar Waheed was a senior marketing student at Iowa State University. After graduating, Omar planned on attending a master’s program for journalism to expand his love of writing. 

 

In his time at the Daily, Omar was responsible for many important hard-hitting articles such as “Why Iowa should secede from the Union” and “Top ten places to cry on campus.” These articles reshaped the current trajectory of comedy as we know and brought cheer and happiness to all that read them.

 

Omar was last seen 3 hours ago entering the bathroom at the Daily office and has not been seen since. Please, if anyone knows where he is, we need help. We miss him so much. 

 

If given the opportunity, the best way to get his attention is to walk around Welch Ave with half a bottle of Hennesy and Hpnotiq to make the famous pairing first innovated by P. Diddy. Also, not mentioned above, Omar is a bitch for the spotlight. So please keep an eye on any local open mics to find him.

 

Omar, in the small chance you are reading this, we miss you so much and need you to return. They said if you do not, they will not publish this article. Oh wait, I just heard the toilet flush; he is still here.

 

Disregard everything above. Omar is fine. I guess the West Town Hyvee Sushi just greased the old pipes in the wrong way. Well, I guess we will be around for a little longer. Thank you all for a great first semester of comedy. See you all next year!