When planning a wedding, remember to consider premarital counseling as a possible factor. Counseling focuses on issues that couples previously might not have thought of. It brings up questions about the minor details that are often overlooked.

Pastor Anne Strickert from Besthesda Lutheran Church said six months before the wedding is a good time to begin counseling because some couples have complications.

“If there are kids or a big move involved, think about counseling even more in advance,” Strickert said.

Strickert said to think about the wedding and marriage like theater. You practice months and months for the one performance and then in a blink of an eye it is over. Then you are faced with the “What now?” Weddings are the same way. Months go into planning the wedding which only lasts one day. The marriage is what lasts forever.

That is why counseling is so important in her opinion, because it focuses on the long run.

“Couples are required to attend a retreat,” said Pastor David Bovenmyer at Stonebrook Church. This Christian retreat lasts a weekend and is led by several pastors and their wives. The retreat discusses:

• God’s purpose for marriage

• Communication skills

• Conflict resolution

• Which marriages to model

• Sexual relationships

• Differences between men and women and how they complement each other

Bovenmyer said they feel many years are spent on learning the proper skills for vocations, but there is not a chance to learn about marriage itself. This retreat will give couples insight as to what marriage is all about. 

Pastor Doug Lumpkin of Grace Bible Church said his premarital counseling sessions are all private. Prior to the sessions, the couples will fill out a basic assessment. During these sessions they discuss money, sex and lifestyle issues.