Edds: Qualifying the players of the dating game
September 12, 2012
We all came to college in one of five ways, in terms of a relationship. These five ways include: happily single; unhappily single and looking specifically for a significant other; unhappily single but not wanting to settle down with any one person; in a good, strong, healthy, long-distance relationship; or in a bad long-distance relationship that will only dampen our “college experience.”
First, there are the happily single folk. Most college students fall into this category. These people enjoy not being tied down. They like to go out and have fun with their friends and not have anyone to answer to. There are two types of these people, however: one who will go out on a date or two when asked, and the other that would prefer to be single for quite a bit longer. These people enjoy having lots of friends and just hanging out, rather than going out.
Second, there are the unhappily single and looking for a significant other. These are those girls that came to college looking to earn their “MRS” degree. Of course, this applies to boys as well. Some come to college in order to find their perfect soul mate and drop out of college. They are here to find the significant other that will change their life entirely and won’t rest until they do. They go out on dates and are often the ones to ask others on dates.
Third, there are the unhappily single but not wanting to settle down with any one person. They are often times classified as “serial daters” — those who are never content with being alone but never capable of finding just one person to be with at a time. These are the students that tend to go on lots of dates with several different people. They want a new relationship, but they want to explore what the world’s got to offer first. Students of this nature seem to have every one of the opposite sex’s numbers on speed dial in their cellphones and will constantly be found draped over one or another of said members.
Fourth, there are those in a good, strong, healthy long-distance relationship. These students have a tough road ahead of them. It takes a lot of work, skill, patience and compassion to make these relationships work. The people of this genre can be found sometimes being mistaken for number ones because they like to hang out with all of their friends. They don’t spend time moping over their distance but rather spend time making the best of what they have laid out in front of them because they have trust in their relationship. They’re willing to put their feelings and heart “on hold.”
Last, there are the students in a bad long-distance relationship that will only dampen the “college experience.” Students in a situation as such need to re-evaluate their standards. Often times, these people don’t realize they’re in a “bad” relationship. However, they find themselves hating college, because they’re not spending every second of every day with their significant other. They are often times sad and angry, and may even get jealous easily. These students should definitely consider another of the five options.
I do fit into one of these categories, as does everyone else on this campus. I am a “No. 4.” A girl happily stuck in a long-distance relationship. I, however, know that my relationship is a good, strong, healthy one because I do go out with my friends and I do all of the things I’ve listed here.
Don’t get me wrong. I have those days — the ones where I do nothing but cry because the heart does get depressed over separation. However, the majority of my days are spent happily carrying on. I can focus on my classes and I text nonstop throughout the day. My boyfriend and I began as very close friends before we ever started dating and I think that’s why he and I work so well. It takes a certain amount of loyalty and closeness for a long-distance relationship to ever work, because it is a tough challenge to take on. I’ll never regret the relationship I’m in, and I don’t think I’d give it up for anything, no matter how difficult it seems to get.
The other examples above aren’t uncommon on this campus either. My roommate is a very happy “No. 1.” She lives life to the absolute fullest but doesn’t necessarily need or want a boyfriend. She loves her friends and her school work and wouldn’t settle for anything less than the best day of her life every day.
Another student I know is a “No. 2.” He looks for affection from everyone and won’t be happy with his college career until he’s found his perfect mate, his companion for forever.
And the last student I’m going to mention, is one of my best friends of all time. He’s the other exception to the “No. 1” category. He loves life and would much rather hang out with his friends than anything in this world, but he wouldn’t necessarily mind having a girlfriend to hold.
After my examples, and my personal experience, I hope this article will keep everyone on their toes about what part they’re playing in the dating game.