Bob Vander Plaats is a sore loser.

Granted, he only lost to Terry Branstad in the Republican primaries by a margin of, well, Rod Roberts, but still, it’s hardly surprising that basing an entire campaign on false pretenses doesn’t translate into electoral success.

What sorts of false pretenses you ask? How about his pledge to “sign an executive order banning same-sex marriages” once elected?

I’ll get around to his judge-huntin’ via Iowa for Freedom, but let’s back up a few steps:

Does an executive order trump a Supreme Court ruling? No. Somebody must have forgotten to mention that to ol’ Bobby. Maybe that slip of the mind is the kind of convenience you’re afforded when your target demographic isn’t big on fact-checking?

See, Torquemada Vander Plaats wants to spin the Iowa Supreme Court’s decision regarding gay marriage as an attack on the freedoms of Iowans, hence the name. Apparently, if you’re not free to discriminate against minorities via the legality of marriage, next thing you know that darn court’s gonna be taking your guns and your property. That’s not copping “South Park,” either — that’s actually on his website. Yee-haw.

So, this special-interest crusade wasn’t formed in a last-ditch attempt to retain some semblance of political relevancy. No, all he wants is your “no” votes against those judicial activists. Upholding the notion that denying citizens marriage licenses based on sexual orientation is of no important governmental interest? How dare they.

Surprise! Notorious B.V.P. also forgot the retention vote is a mechanism designed to safeguard against corruption and incompetence on the bench, not unpopular rulings.

So what do the folks who aren’t pandering to conservative interests have to say about this idea? Let’s ask Sandra Day O’Connor:

“The health of the nation is affected by the system we use to pick judges … as Iowa goes, so goes the nation. I wish the nation would hurry up and go your direction.”

Fancy that, she said there’s nothing wrong with the system. So why bother changing it?

Simple: Bob Vander Plaats is among the minority of Iowans who believe they have a divine prerogative to legislate their moral values. I guess the definition of freedom for these people includes the freedom to legally discriminate against a specific minority. So, their response to this judicial tyranny — their term for politicizing the legal system — is to form a special-interest group to politicize the legal system.

I guess if you pontificate loudly enough, people won’t notice how hypocritical you’re being.

Iowa for Freedom is nothing more than an anti-gay crusade masquerading as judicial reform in an attempt to deny the LGBT community the rights bestowed upon the straight, white, conservative Christian majority. Since it’s politically incorrect to just come out and say that, the Vander Plaats solution is to engineer a coup against the Iowa Supreme Court. Not only is their name completely antithetical to their purpose, they’re also doing exactly what they claim they’re trying to stop.

It’s like Ghandi starting a war over pacifism.

Personally, I’ve always treated the polls as the place where I decide who gets to waste my tax dollars, not the place to thump my Bible and tell people how I think they should live.

Isn’t that what the space outside of Parks Library is for?