Movie Review: ‘Takers’

Gabriel Stoffa

I loved the “Ocean’s Eleven” movies. Ensemble casts really make me smile.

“Takers” looked to be such a movie, but without a superbly charming cast and having a much more violent outlook toward the crimes in question.

Naturally, I was a little worried the movie would be just another attempt to have some cool-ish characters make audiences want to be criminals living the high life. Luckily, the previews suggested a neatly noir backdrop, so I went to the theater with an even kilter, ready to analyze and pick at without an agenda.

From the get-go, the movie looked like it was going to be a let-down. The opening introduction of the characters along with the haphazard escape plan was cool looking, but little else. Then the characters have a superfluous explosion behind them as they walk away with their stolen money to drive off in expensive vehicles.

I could already feel that little voice in my head clearing its throat:

“This movie is yet another poor attempt to appeal to audiences through good-looking people committing outlandish crimes but without a deeper sense of meaning or depth in character development.”

My little voice was warming up, poised to pounce and rip apart whatever else flickered across the screen next.

Then “Takers” did something surprising, it started into actual character development. The noir feel I had gotten from the previews drifted in; my little voice choked, cocking its head and staring on with interest.

This character development wasn’t of the degree that appears in top-notch films, but it was reasonable and provided a reason to have some form of investment in the trials the characters were certainly to face.

So, with a real desire to see what happened I started to get into the flow of the film.

Hayden Christensen, Chris Brown, Michael Ealy, Idris Elba and Paul Walker made up the crew of adept thieves, with the late addition of the dark horse, T.I., the crew member who had gotten caught and was just released from prison.

Now the conflict appeared; the movie had a villain.

T.I. was fine for the role given him, though the role was simple enough that playing it improperly would be difficult for anyone claiming to be an actor.

The good-guy roles of the film were played by Jay Hernandez and Matt Dillon as the cops in pursuit of the dapper thieves.

Hernandez was fine as the youngish cop with an obvious need to fulfill a father-figure role with his dedication to Dillon. Dillon played the venerable, worn-out cop role well; of course he did, that’s probably the easiest role to cast him in because that’s the way he acts. Don’t get me wrong, he does it well, but it’s sorta like casting Tommy “Tiny” Lister as an intimidating aggressive guy; it’s just obvious.

Now the plot started to get dull again as the development occurring went only skin-deep with its cliche problems to be overcome and loose reasoning for decisions.

My little voice had shaken off its interest and was ready to annihilate this film for making it want to become invested. Then a rationalization occurred:

“‘Takers isn’t supposed to be a great movie. Look at it. The characters are all pretty and stylish. Everyone and everything is a stereotype to some degree. This is like watching ‘Entourage,'” my little voice said. “And you love ‘Entourage.’ So just enjoy this as you would a fine scotch: Sit back and take the world in.”

The revelation opened up my mind to the film again. The story wasn’t supposed to be very deep or even very good. I was supposed to imagine that this was a movie like the short movies Vinnie Chase did in “Entourage,” a show I deeply adore.

Nothing needed to be very good, it just had to appeal to a bored audience seeking escape from their dull lives; much like every reality show people continue to train their brains with by viewing.

Normally, I’d still tear the film apart simply because it was trying too hard to have substance while only being a mindless MTV-like presentation that audiences can look to for fashion advice or how to try and be cool.

I was going to give “Takers” a Get Out of Jail Free card because it reminded me of “Entourage” and because of one other bit I could hardly ignore: the suits.

I love a good suit, and this movie even featured a scene where suits, shirts and ties were being laid out properly for no other purpose than to show audiences how much they should want to wear suits, rather than the T-shirts and jeans they so often do.

In case you hadn’t noticed, my Get Out of Jail Free card has basically meant I go into little detail about the movie, as there isn’t really much to attempt to go into. On the surface you can be entertained by the film’s action and wonder at the treasures that may lie beneath. But if you dip your brow too close, you notice no depth, only the sand and rocks waiting to take form after years of wear by the waves.

Much like my rather lame metaphor, the actors in “Takers” were OK, but need more time to find shape and smooth out the rough edges. The story was well known, played out dozens of times before, but wasn’t bad enough to warrant an instant dismissal from the ranks of viewing. Really, the best thing about the movie is the cool look the thieves give off and the parkour escape scene toward the end of the film.

Watch “Takers” sometime when you are bored on a weeknight. Watch it as background noise, but don’t rush out to see it. I may have given it a Get Out of Jail Free card, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a crime to spend your time going to the theater to see it.