As the proverb goes, “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.” We’ve probably all heard this, and have a general idea of what it means: essentially, don’t be ungrateful when you receive a gift. But the old proverb’s origin is worth some discussion.

First recorded in 1546 in Englishman John Heywood’s “A Dialogue Conteinyng the Nomber in Effect of all the Prouerbes in the Englishe Tongue,” the phrase was written “No man ought to looke a geuen hors in the mouth,” and refers to the fact that a horse’s age can be estimated by the projection of its teeth.

Quite ironic, then, that the British people — those who populate the land from which the proverb came — did just what the it suggests one not do when their newspapers expressed outrage at the gift President Obama gave Gordon Brown during his visit to the States a few weeks ago.

After receiving an admittedly well-chosen gift — a pencil holder carved from the HMS Gannet, the antislavery sister ship of the HMS Resolute, from which the Oval Office desk was carved and given to Rutherford Hayes from Queen Victoria — Obama generously reciprocated with a perfectly suitable DVD set of Hollywood movies.

So what that the movies wouldn’t play on Brown’s European player once he arrived home. Was Obama actually supposed to know that?

In a word, yes — this may be one of worst gifts the United States has ever given.

Sure, the gifts that the United States gives — and gets, for that matter — may not seem all that important, but the pomp and circumstance that have accompanied diplomatic visits since our nation was born do matter to some extent.

I’m not saying that inter-nation gift-giving is more important than economic trade, anti-terrorism cooperation and the like, but our nation should be able to give as good as it gets — or, at the very least, to not embarrass itself in the process.

The State Department has an entire office dedicated to foreign visits for Pete’s sake!

No, Obama’s chief of diplomatic protocol doesn’t suck at her job — the president hasn’t appointed one yet — but whoever suggested giving Brown a collection of films that included Psycho should get the axe — even if the DVDs had been Euro compatible.

How hard could this job really be?

I may not be the most well-traveled or stylish individual, but given the current state of our dilapidated economy, there are plenty of suitable gifts I would have told Obama to take to last week’s G20 summit had I had his ear. Here are a few ideas:

To Argentina, some Iowa-raised beef. Sure, their grass-fed meat may be healthier, but they should taste that beautiful white marbling.

To Australia, some fire hoses. I hear they are having some trouble with wildfires.

To Brazil, a few tankers of U.S. ethanol. Yeah, theirs is sustainable — but sugar is for eating.

To Canada, the participation of Shaun White in the 2010 Winter Olympics. Because everybody knows that without him, nobody would show up in Vancouver.

To China, student debt-backed securities, because the mortgage-backed variety are dunzo, and we need somebody to help us out with our money trouble.

To France, some Idaho freedom fries and Hellmann’s mayonnaise. Sure, fries were invented by some French-speaking Belgians, and mayo was invented by a French

Duke back in 1756, but they can’t get enough, and we make both of them better.

To Germany, a photo of former President Bush grabbing the shoulders of Angela Merkel so she can always remember that priceless look of constipation and fear on her face.

To India, some more banking customer service jobs. They aren’t going to start lending ever again if they have to pay this country’s minimum wage.

To Indonesia, some prefabricated bridges. The country looks like a jumble of puzzle pieces.

To Italy, a little car company called Chrysler. Trust us, it has a solid foundation.

To Japan, a few thousand passenger planes. Yes, it’s already our main export to them, but we aren’t getting any use of them here.

To Mexico, more guns. They need something to control the drug trade that we require.

To Russia, some railroad equipment. Our steel industry could use a boost, and Russia is one big country.

To Saudi Arabia, our Gitmo prisoners. If they had anything to do with Sept. 11, they would probably have some friends or family there anyway — 12 out of the 19 terrorists were Saudis.

To South Africa, all those condoms that go unsold in the Catholic-heavy state of Rhode Island, and the allegedly abstinent state of Texas.

Because regardless of what the Pope told the African continent, condoms do guard against HIV.

To South Korea, a stem cell research ethics manual. Apparently we are taking the lead in stem cell research now, but that doesn’t mean we couldn’t use some help — if their researchers agree not to fake any more results.

To Turkey, more nuclear weapons — of course, without the codes for engagement. The country is pretty close to Iran — if the time ever comes, maybe we will even let

them push one of the buttons.

And most importantly: to the UK, a desk for the Prime Minister carved from the three ships of Boston Tea Party fame — the Dartmouth, the Beaver and the Eleanor — and “The American Revolution,” the 482 minute-long, British DVD player-compatible set.

Sure, this combo gift could rekindle some less than favorable memories, but it more than makes up for Obama’s first attempt at gift-giving.

See? Diplomatic gift-giving isn’t so hard.

But this column hopefully shows that while Obama might not be great at it yet, he could do worse. As to whatever gifts he did choose to give at the G20 last week, let’s just hope an economic turnaround results.

— Steve Adams is a graduate student in political science from Annapolis, Md.