From the Desk of Justan Spaid.

Dear President Obama,

I saw today that you left our country and headed across the pond for the first time as the American president. This, of course, was to attend the G20 summit, where you and the leaders of the other 19 richest countries in the world will discuss the growing global recession. I’m sure you will be a little more confident in the American market after the summit. After all, we aren’t as screwed as other nations around the world — yet.

Of course, Obama, you left the country a day early to spend an extra day in London and meet with her royal majesty herself, Queen Elizabeth II. How does it feel to meet another political figurehead who also is not qualified to run a country?

I hope your meeting went better as the day wore on, because it did start off on the wrong foot. Your own personal limousine was found parked in front of the Buckingham Palace garden, and had to be moved to let in some people it was blocking — the royal family.

After that, you proceeded to not bow to the Queen, to whom 11 of the last 12 presidents have bowed. The only other one who didn’t bow was Lyndon Johnson — but that’s because he never met the Queen.

Instead of bowing, you in fact gave the Queen a double-handed handshake, which of course everyone knows is a big no-no. But I’m sure she barely noticed. I mean, she’s only the Queen of England.

You did have a chance to make up for the first few awkward acts by giving her a good gift. In fact, the gift that you did give her was quite good, had she been a junior high-school to college-aged person.

You gave her an iPod, which isn’t that impressive — since the gift receiver is the Queen of England — aside from the fact that she already had one.

Maybe she could use this one for jogging. In return, she gave you a signed portrait of herself and husband Prince Phillip, which I’m sure has tons of sentimental value — c’mon, had you splurged a little more you could have gotten something really nice.

Probably that desk from “National Treasure 2” — you know, the one that leads to the president’s Book of Secrets. Maybe there’s a chapter in there on not bailing out automakers and keeping the deficit under $11 trillion.

If not, it’s no big deal. After all, it’s my kids and grandkids who will have to pay for it — no worries.

You did have one last final blunder, and that was dodging the question of who was going to win the UEFA World Cup qualifying game being played between England and the Ukraine.

You sidestepped the question, saying how people gave you grief back here for filling out your NCAA bracket, so you weren’t even going to try and predict the winner of British futbol. But the answer was so easy, you actually looked sillier not answering the question.

Wayne Rooney has the British squad playing at a pretty high level, and the fact that you were in London of all places means you have to answer England as the winner.

All these mistakes aside, I’m sure you’re having a wonderful time in London and in Europe.

Many adoring Europeans showed up to wave and cheer to you as you drove around the streets. I’m sure that boosted your spirits.

Who knows, maybe you’ll like it so much over there that you will just stay. I’m sure Romney could do a fine job filling your presidential shoes. Take care.

Your good friend and fellow patriot,

Justan Paul Spaid