I am not a hypocrite. I am not a hypocrite. I am not hypocrite!

This became my mantra the few days after I voted on Nov. 4. Only a week before, I had stubbornly stuck to my decision not to vote in this election. On Halloween weekend, I debated with myself about my decision and enlisted a few of my friends for help.

After my original column came out two weeks ago, I received multiple comments from readers on the Daily Web site, friends on Facebook, family and friends. Even random people I met that week had their opinions. Some supported my decision and others, well, let’s just say they had rather differing views.

Soon I realized that all along I was truly looking for someone’s argument to change my mind about voting. Most readers, however, didn’t try to debate the fact but just disregarded my view, spewed theirs and to hell with the rest. This only convinced me further that voting, and politics in general, was something I completely wanted to steer clear of.

I took my own advice and started paying attention to the issues, not the campaign ads. I read up on policies instead of listening to biased opinions of my family or friends. I respect their decisions, but I needed to find my own reasons for who and why I was voting. I surprised myself in the realization of how much there was to learn.

Monday morning I decided I was going to vote. I had heard some decent arguments and learned a lot. First, the Electoral College votes hold pretty much all of the sway, so my vote wouldn’t make too much of a difference. Second, being a libertarian doesn’t mean what I thought it meant.

Third, it’s very awkward to be an opinion writer during an election year and to not have an opinion on who should be in office.

With 24 hours left to go, I requested one Republican and one Democrat give me their reasons on why I should vote for their chosen candidates. The results were interesting, but both put up pretty good fronts. Between that, and the information I’d collected previously, I felt prepared for the next day.

Many people were lined up to vote early in the morning as I went to collect breakfast, so I decided to wait. Around lunchtime I came upon the same result with the same conclusion. Finally, I decided if I didn’t go then, I never would. I got in line with the paper and resigned to settle in for a while. Two people got in line behind me and debated their candidates, and at one moment I couldn’t help but laugh. I tried to stick my face further in the paper so they wouldn’t notice.

A few minutes had passed and I had gone through the paper. The line had gotten significantly longer and one or two people gave me a funny look. Do they recognize me from my column? Do they wonder why I’m in line to vote? Am I going to be slapped?

I told myself I was being paranoid and thought about the massive amounts of homework waiting for me at home. A kid came out and I could have sworn I was recognized. I started second-guessing myself. Am I giving up my beliefs? Is this really worth it? What if I check the wrong boxes? I’m pretty sure they weren’t using pencils with great big erasers.

Yeah, I guess you could say I started getting paranoid. I entered my booth and started to fill out the long ballot.

Why is that guy in the corner staring at me? Check the box for president. Seriously, why is he staring at me? Check other boxes. Is he staring at anyone else? I glanced around. Nope.

Flip to other side. Start to fill out boxes. OK, the creepy guy left the room. I left as soon as I could. “Would you like the ‘I voted’ sticker?” the man asked me. I stifled a laugh and accepted one.

This is the first presidential election I’ve had the opportunity to vote in and I’ve seen what politics can do. I’ve seen family members argue and hold grudges. I’ve seen perfectly good people separate themselves between Republicans and Democrats, red and blue, left and right. I’ve heard the whispers about how a dark-skinned man would ruin our country and trips to Canada being planned. I’ve listened to women make jokes targeting the female candidates.

I have seen the ads run by candidates slaying the other’s integrity. I had started to feel myself fall under the power of the election.

No matter how I feel about either party, the moral of the story is to remember that we’re not just red or blue, but we’re all Americans who want this country to be the best that it can be. We want to live in a place of peace and democracy that our ancestors fought for. We vote because we believe. Voting isn’t my obligation to be fulfilled — it’s a choice to be part of something bigger and older than myself. I educated myself on the issues and now remind myself that I’m not a hypocrite — I’m an American who chose to participate in a memorable and historical election.