Facebook Notification: You have one new creeper request.

Don’t you wish Facebook had notifications like that? It already knows everything else about us; creeper notifications seem to be the next logical step. That way we could at least know what we’re getting into with each new friend request.

In the age of social networking, is Facebook the new pick-up method of choice? Has “Can I get your number?” been replaced with “Can we be Facebook friends?” Is it okay that we’re making this shift in the way we establish relationships?

On Halloween, I went out for the evening dressed as Sarah Palin. My costume sparked some conversations, and naturally, I met a lot of people. One who stands out in my mind was a young man dressed as Michael Phelps. We ran into each other several times throughout the evening, and toward the end of the night, he approached me with a Sharpie.

“Tell me how this sounds: Sarah Phelps.”

It sounds kind of ridiculous, but that was beside the point. He reached for my hand, and I thought he was going to autograph it with a Michael Phelps signature. But when I looked at what he had written, it was a name I didn’t recognize. I was puzzled, so he explained that he had given me his real name, and I should add him on Facebook.

Several nights later, I was at a concert. After discussing the performance with me throughout the evening, the young man next to me asked if we could take a picture together so I could tag him on Facebook. I had never been asked anything like that before, but I obliged — more out of confusion than anything else. Again, he had to give me his full name in order for me to tag him in the picture.

The way he asked me to “tag him” was so natural, as if I should immediately understand what he was asking. When I got home and uploaded the pictures to my Facebook account, I decided I might as well add my new Facebook friend so that I could complete the tags for my pictures.

I couldn’t help but wonder if this was going to be another one of those “friendships” where the “friends” never really acknowledge each other after the initial request and acceptance.

It was.

In the interest of this column, I took a look at my friend count on Facebook. It’s 411.

411. Really? I don’t think I could come up with more than 200 people that I’d want to invite to a birthday party, and that’s an incredibly generous guest list. Where did all of these people come from?

Some of them unfortunately came from the “People You May Know” feature — one of Facebook’s worst ideas, ever. This sidebar on the Facebook homepage suggests you become friends with people — usually friends of friends, or people you went to high school with.

Okay, usually you’re not already friends with these people for a reason. But then they see your name, and they send you a friend request, and you have no good reason to ignore it — voila, another friend to add to the count.

Then there are the people who send friend requests because of mutual friends. I had one of these, and assuming I might have met the person and not remembered it, I accepted the request. I soon found out that we had not met, but was immediately asked out for coffee because I seemed like such a “lovely girl.”

What was it that tipped him off? My profile picture? My “About Me” information? Those are usually good indicators of someone’s character.

I’m sure this guy is perfectly nice, but he is a perpetuating the creeper behavior that has become commonplace on Facebook.

Some advice for anyone who has considered asking someone out based on their Facebook profile: 1) People usually try to portray themselves in the best possible light on their Facebook profiles. Who would ever include their commitment issues, bad habits, or general character flaws in their “About Me” section? 2) Gentlemen, a smart woman will realize very quickly that you’re interested in her based on a profile picture, and that’s not appealing.

I’m not saying Facebook isn’t a good way to get to know people, or even to get a flirtation going. In many ways it seems less scary than giving someone your number. Just keep in mind that giving someone access to your Facebook profile gives him or her access to a lot of the details of your life.

For those of you who are trolling Facebook, looking for a date, try getting out in the real world and actually meeting someone with whom you hit it off. And when you do meet someone you’d like to see again, be a real man or woman, and call the person — or better yet, ask him or her out in person!

You’d be amazed at what real human contact can do for a relationship. Who knows, maybe things will go really well and you’ll be able to change your relationship status from “Single” to “In a Relationship.”

— Jessica Opoien is a freshman in English and pre-journalism and mass communication from Marinette, Wis.