As my roommate and I sat in our lovely living room one evening, discussing all range of topics from politics to EasyMac, she suddenly said something that surprised me.

“I got a cat-call on the way home from work,” she said. “It made me feel really uncomfortable.”

This was interesting to me because while I admit I haven’t the kind of attributes that she possesses, I’m personally not offended when I get a cat-call. It actually makes me feel very attractive and sexy. Yet here was someone on the opposite end of the spectrum, who felt uneasy and uncomfortable with the idea.

What could be the cause of this? Is it that my own self-image and hers are affected differently? Is it the environment? The world we live in? Is it the context in which things are said and the actual content of the message?

The answer, I’ve found, seems to be a combination of all of the above and more.

To use an old saying, “Seek and ye shall find.” Women who are seeking approval — especially of their physical features — are far more likely to respond positively to compliments, flirtation, and cat-calls. To clarify — yes, I fall into this category.

The way we can infer this is from gender studies by researchers such as Eleanor Maccoby and Carol Jacklin, authors of “The Psychology of Sex Differences.” In their studies, Maccoby and Jacklin found that women were far more likely than men to express low self-confidence in situations where achievement was an ultimate goal.

In a culture such as ours, where we are constantly told that relationships are not only fun, exciting and reality-television goldmines, but that they are nearly vital to our existence. Is there any other reason for the phrase “It’s not what you know but who you know?”

Hence, relationships become an achievement and pursuit. When I asked some male acquaintances how they approach women, some common responses were, “someone has to play hard to get,” or “men are hunters, our prey just happens to be a little different from time to time,” or “it’s a game of cat and mouse.”

You know how a cat will “play” with a mouse? Right before the mouse gets, you know, killed? Something to think about next time before you put that analogy out there.

The point is that there’s a profound difference between flirtation — two individuals acting in a cohesive manner to achieve a common goal — and pursuit, where one party is the “hunter” and the other is “prey.”

To put it simply: Human beings are not things to toy with. We are not to be seen as prizes to be obtained. Saying “Hey, you’re cute” at a party is not the same as saying “Damn, check that ass” on a dark sidewalk.

You’d think I wouldn’t have to explain something like this, but people just don’t seem to understand that when someone is not interested, you need to stop. When the situation is inappropriate, you need to stop.

I wouldn’t say this if there wasn’t a problem. But there is one, and the sad reality is that women’s voices are not being heard when they say no.

Nationally, there were 272,350 sexual assaults in 2006 according to the U.S. Department of Justice’s National Crime Victimization Survey. That’s over 746 a day. That’s one every 2 minutes. If a rape is reported, there is just barely over 50/50 odds that an arrest will be made. Sound like good odds to you?

Factor in the statistic that one in five college-age women has reported forced sexual interaction according to a 1995 National College Health Risk Behavior Survey and that if trends have continued since then, the chance is actually higher now.

Do this and you wind up with a truly staggering — and terrifying — world.

Do some women like being ogled? Certainly. As I’ve said before, I actually enjoy the attention. But I’ve also said that I have low self-confidence and I seek approval. I can analyze myself honestly and realize that we don’t need women like me. We need strong, able women — and men — who can stand up and say “This is wrong, and it needs to stop.”

Know anyone willing to do that?

— Sophie Prell is a junior in pre-journalism and mass communication from Alta.