Ah yes, Valentine’s Day is upon us – Where single women can band together, drink wine and sing Jamie O’Neal’s “All by Myself,” and couples can get so mushy they rival a geriatric meal plan.

I, however, am stuck in the limbo of a long-distance relationship.

At the mention of this preposterous romantic situation, I am frequently the source of public commentary here in the Emerald Isle.

“Oh, you’ve got a boyfriend in the States? That must be really hard, like. Do you think you’ll stay together?” my friend Kiera asked.

Her friend Edwina cut in, “I’m sure he’s grand, but a boy like that is too lovely to . I mean, you’re sure he’s faithful, right?”

As a psychology nerd, I know textbooks say proximity is actually the No. 1 factor in attraction; a 3,848-mile relationship does seem a bit nonsensical. Being in such a situation, however, there must be something powerful about a stubborn romance that renders those involved mentally incapacitated.

“This won’t be hard,” I thought as I boarded the plane. “It’s only five months – Clayton and I will use webcams to talk every now and again. I definitely won’t be ‘that girl’ who obsesses over her U.S. boyfriend.”

My first lonely night I was determined not to become shackled to chocolate, photos and my computer. I decided to hit the Qube, a local dance club. How hard can fidelity be?

Much to my surprise, however, I discovered that the charming “Iowa accent,” so boring and common in Ames, is like an Irish neon sign saying, “Hit on me!”

“That’s brilliant that you’re from the States,” slurred one Irish sir. Slipping his arm around my shoulder, he winked and added, “How do ye feel about long distance relationships?”

As much fun as it would be to bring home an STD as a souvenir, I decided my best response was, “I think they’re fantastic – my boyfriend and I are doing great, thanks.”

Walking the winding cobblestone streets home, I realize most people who go out are either attempting to meet a new interest or express their existing affection as physically as possible – often — with the aid of poles.

What is it about men and women that we are compelled to have romantic contact, whether it be for a lifetime of loving or a one-night stand?

Perhaps it’s the alcohol. In a 2004 Georgetown University study, college-aged males viewed photographs of similarly aged women and rated them on attractiveness. Properly titled the “Beer Goggles” study, as intoxication levels increased, so did the ratings of women.

Or maybe it’s the pheromones. The word pheromone, coming from the Greek words for “to transfer” and “to excite,” is a specific substance we secrete, detectable through the scent, which has the potential to attract a mate.

In a survey done by Bennett Research, these powerful attracting pheromones were tested on a group of men, creating a striking increase in attention from the ladies. Thirty percent of men selected to wear the pheromone reported women touching them more frequently, 17 percent had women express a desire for sex, and 16 percent actually had sex.

As a hopeless romantic, I know it’s more than booze and biochemistry drawing people together. If these two factors were sufficient, Clayton and I would have no chance as we live 67,725 football fields apart.

Beyond scientific factors, we all desire simply to be loved. And fulfilling this need can often prove just as difficult as putting it into words.

Love is knowing her recent environmental bicycle kick was only to mask that she lost her driver’s license. Love is not eating tuna sandwiches because he hates the way it smells. Love is being driven crazy by her incessant love of dogs, but missing her every time you see one.

Ultimately, love is personal.

I wouldn’t say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, rather that it makes the heart grow stronger to rise to the challenges, frustrations and rewards brought by separation.

Thus, I have become a laptop lover. And I’d recommend buying stock in Cadbury, Ireland’s most delicious dark chocolate supplier.

– Julie Young is a senior in psychology from Indianola. She is studying in Cork, Ireland, this semester. Today is her 21st birthday.