GAME REVIEW: Roundabout

Andrew Shafer

On a recent Friday night, I had a revelation: some things just seem better when you’ve been drinking — gyros, running naked down Lincoln Way, the new board game “Roundabout.”

Although this wasn’t exactly a life-altering revelation, it seemed particularly poignant because I just happened to be partaking in a game of “Roundabout” with my roommates at the time.

“Roundabout” is the unnecessarily complicated, mediocre at best — although self-proclaimed “revolutionary” — board game from Otero Games.

The game goes a little something like this: The board is circular — much like the wheels of the tricycle you ride to class every day — complete with spokes, or “bars” as they are referred to by the game’s lovely designers.

Each player begins with 10 game pieces, and the goal of the game is to remove all pieces from the board.

There are two ways to remove the pieces.

First, if a player moves a game piece all the way around the board and back to his or her home area (where the pieces began), that piece is removed from the board.

Second, if a player is able to get four of his or her pieces lined up on consecutive spots on the board, that player gets to remove all four pieces.

This maneuver takes much more strategy and is significantly more difficult — especially when you’re about six rum and cokes into the night.

Sounds easy enough, right? Wrong.

The instructions included with the game are harder to understand than Benicio Del Toro in “The Usual Suspects.”

I know what you’re thinking: “Well, of course the instructions seemed difficult — he had been drinking.”

But, au contraire, mon frere. I read and re-read the instructions many times when I was sober before sitting down to take on the real thing, and they were no easier to decipher then.

So after we had so diligently set the stage for our cozy night at home — drinks mixed, NCAA tournament on TV — the instructions killed the mood quicker than your parents surprising you in your dorm room during your “alone time” with your significant other.

But, much like Destiny’s Child, I’m a survivor.

Although it took us nearly an hour to resurrect our newly flaccid evening, we trudged on and figured out how to play the game. Even though we had a little help from our old friend Captain Morgan, once we figured out the instructions the game turned out to be OK. OK is as far as I will take it, though.

Sure, the instructions need work (a lot of work) and the winner of the game is almost always determined by who gets to go first. Yet, for that brief moment between the directions becoming slightly comprehensible and the end of the first game, “Roundabout” can be fun — well, at least more fun than getting kicked in the face by a mule.

But, like Ashton Kutcher, it’s only cool in small doses — very small doses.

After the first game, it’s all downhill from there. The game gets progressively more boring with each play as your buzz starts to wear off.

It’s almost as though the people at Otero are very well aware of this fact — they include two “Roundabout”-themed coasters with the game.

Perhaps they were meant for a tall glass of lemonade, but I think not.