The American people have sent a powerful message. When the terrorists see that the American electorate will vote against its own self-interest to re-elect a complete failure all in the name of religious fundamentalism, they will finally see that we aren’t so different after all.

“Evil doers” all around the world are throwing their weapons away and scrapping their plans because it’s time to unite under the warm glow of religious extremism. Finally, we can all work together with our fellow extremists to tackle the really important issues of the day like how we’re going to stop the frightening epidemic of contraception distribution in Africa.

Nate Fitzgerald

Junior

Mechanical Engineering