There are three things in life that ISU students DON’T want to be:

1. A lonely DPS worker. It boggles my mind why any student would want to work for DPS. Maybe they just like driving around in their little parking division Ford Rangers.

2. That guy who’s always late and running after the bus. He’s holding his books with one arm and holding up his pants with the other. He runs after the bus frantically and once he gets on he is breathing like he just ran a marathon.

3. And maybe the most shameful of all, an ISU kicker.

A 17-10 loss to Iowa would have been completely different with made field goals and nothing needs to be said about the Colorado game. Missing two kicks under 30 yards and losing the game by five. That’s a joke.

This is the Big 12 — not junior high. No blame goes to coach Dan McCarney for all of this. Injuries happen. Blame can’t even be placed on the freshman kickers.

The question needs to be asked, what in the world is going on with Tony Yelk?

If the guy is seriously hurt, that’s one thing, but if he’s just holding out to get a medical redshirt, then that’s another.

If that’s the case, then Tony needs to consider the people he’s letting down — fans and teammates.

Odds are he is seriously injured, but fans need to know exactly what is wrong and what’s being done. Is he going to get a medical? Is he going to attempt to play this year?

First it was a pulled muscle, now a hip flexor. That’s the only injury other than a broken foot that would affect a kicker.

But he was hurt in July. He still can’t play? You have to feel for Yelk because if he is hurt, he’s getting a terrible rap. All fans have heard is he has a pulled muscle. For Yelk’s sake, that doesn’t sound too good.

If he has a serious injury, why isn’t a statement issued instead of each week stating he’s questionable? He was listed as a game-time decision all week of the Colorado game. He didn’t even make the trip. What’s wrong with this situation?

Injuries happen — fans just want to know the facts. He’s a hell of a kicker, and this team needs him badly. If Yelk played this year, Iowa State could be 5-2. That’s one win away from a bowl game.

If it is a hip flexor, let’s hope Yelk rehabs all winter and comes back to make some kicks next year. A Tony Yelk at 70 percent is much better than a walk-on true freshman at 100.

As for the other kickers, where did we get these guys? Yes, they’re walk-ons, but sweet sassy molassy, did they kick like this during tryouts? There’s no way McCarney’s staff would have let these guys on if they were actually this bad, so one may come to the conclusion that it must be all in their heads.

The pressure this true freshman Brian Jansen has been under is unreal. Everybody around has ripped on the ISU kicking game — rightfully so — but it’s not like Jansen expected to be in this position. The fact is that he’s on the roster and he’s on there to do a job — and it’s not getting done.

So now what? Hire a kicking coach? Not common in college football, but we’ve all learned how important kicking actually is. That shouldn’t need to be done. This offseason one of Coach Mac’s priorities needs to be to recruit a great kicker.

Look at Nate Kaeding for Iowa. Every time Iowa was inside the 30, it knew that it had an automatic three points. That takes pressure off the offense. No wonder the offense can’t get the ball in the end zone. They know that if they don’t then they’ll come away with nothing.

McCarney needs to hit the road looking for a solid kicker who will give the offense some cushion. With the potential that these young ISU players have and the solid redshirts Iowa State has waiting in the wings, it’d be a shame if State misses out on key wins in the future because of a poor kicking game.

The job will get done — it has to. Fans will have to wait and see what happens, and God help us if the worthless DPS is compared to anything that has to do with ISU football ever again.