The Memorial Union’s Great Hall played host to ClubFest last Wednesday. One hundred eighty-eight clubs crowded the room, giving away chintzy crap and trying to sucker students into joining.

Although there were some inexplicable table combinations — like the Libertarians next to Solidarity, the socialist club — all in all, it was another successful year. Many Hershey’s miniature candy bars were eaten, and many e-mail addresses were added to mailing lists, only to be unsubscribed the next day.

But still, fewer than half of the students at Iowa State participate in funded campus organizations, according to the numbers claimed by the organizations themselves. The student activities fee is $29.50 per semester, meaning that students who are not participating in clubs are spending more than $7,000,000 every year to subsidize those who are. And while some of that money goes to resources available to all students, much of it goes to the more than 600 groups on campus.

As a student, you have three options: try to change the funding, sit on your ass and be out 60 bucks for the year or try to milk the system for all it’s worth.

If you’re thinking of change, be aware that the system is pretty resistant to it. The number of clubs on campus is a major selling point for university recruitment, and thus any attempt to reduce the funding is going to be met with skepticism from the Special Student Fees Committee and, ultimately, from the Board of Regents.

Sitting on your ass is always an option. You’re missing out on some pretty sweet deals, though.

If you’re like us, you’ll want to get as much out of your money as you can. You can start with food festivals, which most international clubs have and usually charge the minimum three dollars (or less, but don’t tell GSB) for all-you-can-eat food that rivals anything you can purchase in Ames. Also, be sure to look up the club for your major — or the major you wish you were in — and get a free meal every week or so.

From there, you can check out a recreational club. There is everything from video games such as Dance Revolution and Halo to analog entertainment such as role-playing or fighting with foam swords.

Or, if you’re not a huge nerd, you could try one of the 47 sports clubs.

Have a conscience? Join the student chapters of Habitat for Humanity, Amnesty International or Iowa State’s very own Time For Peace.

In this election year, both the ISU College Republicans and the ISU Democrats are very active.

Or you could join “Dating Awareness To Elevate Sensuality.”

For research purposes, of course.

So join a club. You’re paying for it anyway.