Well, I’ve finally mastered it. I always thought Coach Mac’s job was a tough one, but suddenly, this weekend, it dawned on me how easy it is.

You see, I’ve become quite a master coach with the little help of my NCAA Football 2005 game for Playstation 2. The game has taught me a lot about coaching.

I discovered that all a real-life college coach needs is two defensive plays and five offensive plays (two running and three passing) to succeed.

My first year coaching, my Iowa State Cyclones went 10-2, losing only to Iowa in the last second and to Colorado late in the season. We won the Big 12 Championship game against Texas and won the Fiesta Bowl, beating Virginia Tech.

Quarterback Bret Meyer was fifth in the Heisman voting, and running back Stevie Hicks had 20 touchdowns while, defensively, linebacker Erik Anderson broke the single-season sack record with 25 sacks.

Our second year was even better, going 11-1, with our only loss to Colorado. We beat Oklahoma in the Big 12 Championship game and beat them again in a rematch at the Fiesta Bowl.

Our Heisman winner, quarterback Austin Flynn, led the way throughout the season, gathering more than 3,000 yards and 42 touchdowns. Hicks gathered six touchdowns in the bowl game and declared himself eligible for the NFL draft as a junior. Defensive back Nik Moser was a standout with 17 picks on the season.

Not only that, but I won the Coach of the Year award both years. Heck, this is easy. Obviously I’m a better coach at the age of 21 than Coach Mac, Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz, Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops, USC coach Pete Carroll and LSU coach Nick Saban.

So what does all of this mean? Jack, that’s what.

I’ve heard far too many people who have never even participated in a football game, other than the video game kind, that have tried telling everyone else how to coach a team. But actually, every one who is interested has the chance to coach the right away.

For any of you liberal arts majors that don’t know exactly what you want to do with yourselves yet, or for any of you eighth-year seniors who don’t plan on leaving any time soon, coaching is an option.

For those gung ho on coaching, one must first satisfy the professional teacher education requirements of the College of Education, then satisfy the requirements of a teaching specialization area and also earn credits in Zoology 155 and several exercise and sport science classes.

Another area where you can stay connected with athletics without needing the gaming system is officiating.

All you need to do to become a paid high school referee is to take the test to show you know the rules. It’s fairly cheap, and it lets you get off your butt and stay close to sports. It’s really not that hard to pass the test. After all, I passed all of them, and I’m sure a lot of you are smarter than I am.

Quit being a Monday morning (or in college football’s case, a Sunday morning) quarterback. It’s easy telling people what they did wrong after the case, heck, but it’s different when you’re out there calling the plays or making the calls on the field.

You can do one of two things. You can put your money where your mouth is and go out and do something besides complain, or you can take that money and bet it with me in a game of NCAA Football 2005. I’ve gotten quite a lot of practice with it by now.