The ties that bind a group of people into families include biology, law, social institution and, most importantly, love. Yet even these things can be missing for people to come together to recognize themselves as a family, and these things can include babies, divorces and homosexual relationships.

Standard families can be messy, and nontraditional family structures do have some success stories. Jesus, Muhammed and Moses didn’t come from traditional families. Jesus had two daddies; Muhammed was orphaned at an early age and raised by his uncle; and Moses was raised by a woman who found him in a river.

This weekend, I went to the wedding of my half-sister, which was traditional and charming. The bride was beautiful, flowers were pretty, guests were fed, and I caught the bouquet to keep my twin sister from getting it.

What really struck me was how so many different families came together to witness the birth of a new lifelong partnership.

My half-sister has two daddies, four half-sisters and two half-brothers, and the fun part about this ceremony was how involved everyone was and how seamlessly all the families came together. This was not just a celebration of one family, but a celebration of the American family.

The American family has evolved over decades of change from the industrial revolution and urbanization to women’s rights to gay and lesbian rights, no-fault divorce and an ever-changing climate of tolerance toward those with varied family structures. The nuclear family still exists in plenitude, and it is still the statistically best environment for raising children. However, that ideal is no longer the only way to define a family.

If we can not define family in the traditional sense, how can we define marriage in the same way? The definition of marriage is now a hot debate with questions about the definition of what the word “marriage” means both legally and socially.

Marriage is designed to create families, but the very concept of a family is ambiguous.

A family is not limited to a mother, a father and little kids, but instead can involve two or three “moms,” a couple of “dads,” and the option of kids.

With this redefinition of family, there can be no clear way for the state to lay out guidelines for what marriage and family are or what they should be.

Instead, true conservative values would beg for the government to stay out of the bedroom, out of marriage and to steer clear of writing dictionaries. Little government is good government, and less time spent telling citizens what family means to them would be a good thing.

As the debate about homosexual marriage rages in legislatures about the definition of marriage — as defined by the ever astute George W. Bush and neo-conservatives — the real problem deals less with the more than 100 legal benefits of legal marriage, but more legitimizing the relationship members of the LGBT community and the potential families they could establish.

The constitutionality of the issue seems pretty clear cut; however, the social ramifications are at odds with some definition of marriage. The 14th Amendment guarantees equal protection under the law for all people, not just those engaged in heterosexual relationships.

Courts ruled on it; it is good; it is clear; and both constitutional purists or conservatives and liberal interpreters can agree on that.

My half-sister’s wedding taught me a lot about the meaning of family and what it really takes for people to be bound to one another. Yep — this is as American as it’s going to get, as traditional as the garter throw and as loving as the institution itself.