In an action movie, one would expect the following: action opening, good guys and bad guys, more action, happy ending.

This film calls itself “Troy” with hardly a resemblance to Homer’s epic, “The Iliad,” upon which it is based. There are no gods or clear-cut heroes that define the “sword and sandal” genre, and “Troy” yearns for those better days when movies with similar scale, such as 1960’s “Spartacus,” would have been tagged an “epic” before the film was even released.

We don’t live in those times anymore — thank God — because mediocrity should not be rewarded. “Troy” should be punished for becoming a steaming heap. The only people to be rewarded for this movie are the people in the Warner Brothers marketing department, who did a marvelous job of selling the film.

The war in Troy isn’t any one person’s fault, but seems mostly to be the product of Agamemnon (Brian Cox), whose arrogance looks for any justifiable reason to head into war. The prettiest man on earth, Paris (Orlando Bloom), steals away the most beautiful woman on earth, Helen (Diane Kruger), who happens to be married to Menelaus (Brendan Gleeson), who happens to be brother to Agamemnon, who is the king of the Greeks — except for Troy.

As if that wasn’t enough of an inferno for the viewer, the story then begins its descent into Hell. To make a long story short, the Greeks go to war with Troy under the pretense of a man whose pride has been hurt.

Brad Pitt portrays Achilles as a self-serving, whiny version of the classic conflicted-hero archetype displayed by Russell Crowe as Maximus in 2000’s “Gladiator.”

The other great hero in “Troy,” as well as most sympathetic, is Hector, played by Eric Bana of “The Hulk.” His character is fully developed and is executed well by Bana, which might be attributed more to his acting than to the writing. Bana brings a sense of being deeply contemplative and aware of the ramifications of each action.

Sean Bean, who played Boromir in “Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring,” plays Odysseus in “Troy” and is portrayed with heart — making him the movie’s second most sympathetic character.

Writer David Benioff must have realized in writing the screenplay the movie should have some resemblance to reality. So, the first thing on the chopping block were the gods of antiquity, a necessity to stay true to “The Iliad.” When he then tries to fill the story with the few side characters having significant parts, he fails miserably to fully develop the main ones.

Homer does get a writing credit though the movie barely stays consistent with the epic poem.

After movies such as Gladiator, the very first and, so far, the best of the modern “sword and sandal” epics, the action of Troy was tame. By keeping characters ambiguous, the greatest of missteps occurred — the bad guys won.

When the bad guys win, all life is sucked out of the audience. The victors loot, plunder, rape, maim and destroy the beacon of light that was once a great city.

The voiceover by Bean at the end falls flat when it’s realized he, as one of the victors, is one of those barbarians responsible for the inferno. This creates a fitting end for the film — going down in flames.