Some very exciting and some very odd things have been happening around the world of sports recently, spurring a new and very generically titled segment in this column called In the News. As the title indicates, here are just a few tidbits and random observations about things that have been in the news:

— Elliot Sadler held off a late charge by NASCAR rookie Kasey Kahne to win the Samsung/Radio Shack 500 in Fort Worth, Texas, on Sunday. Racing fans with the decal of Calvin urinating on the number 24 in the rear window of their pickup trucks will be disappointed to hear that Jeff Gordon finished third.

— The NHL regular season officially ended Sunday night, and the postseason drive for the Stanley Cup will begin later this week. The seven people who are still fans of the league are reportedly very excited.

— The Major League Baseball season got underway last week when the Yankees and Tampa Bay squared off in Tokyo, meaning the Devil Rays still have three months before they are statistically eliminated from playoff contention.

— NBA players are gearing up for the upcoming playoffs, which they affectionately refer to as “the part of the season where we actually try.”

— The ever-controversial Masters begins this week at Augusta National Golf Club. The tournament is expected to go smoothly as long as Fuzzy Zoeller doesn’t make any remarks about Canadian defending champ Mike Weir serving Klondike bars and Labatt Blue at the champions’ dinner.

— Masters chairman Hootie Johnson has also vehemently denied rumors that he and The Blowfish will be parting ways later this year.

— A deafening roar of yawns filled the air in New Orleans on Sunday night as Connecticut and Tennessee won their women’s Final Four matchups to advance to play each other in the championship game. Again.

— Jameer Nelson was named the college Player of the Year by the Sporting News and is the favorite to win many other postseason player of the year awards. Unfortunately, he still trails Allen Iverson by about a pint of ink for the title of the most-tattooed guard in the Philadelphia area.

— Paul Hornung, who claimed last week that Notre Dame should lower its entrance requirements in order to “get the black athlete,” is in danger of losing his job as a broadcaster for Notre Dame football games.

Although Hornung’s comments were based on statistics, he needed to let the fate of Rush Limbaugh teach him that making racially insensitive comments is the fastest way to lose a broadcasting job. If only someone would sneak a racist joke into Bill Walton’s teleprompter…

— In response to the PGA Tour announcing that it wants its players to show more emotion and put on a more entertaining show, Tiger Woods has been seen on the driving range wearing a bracelet emblazoned with the words, “What Would Lil’ Jon Do?”

Woods has also decided to wear his signature red shirt on days other than Sunday in order to project a bolder and more exciting image. The PGA Tour will have created a monster when the rest of the pros follow Tiger’s lead and practice rounds at the BellSouth Classic start to look like the Super Target company picnic.

— To keep up with the PGA Tour’s fitness kick, John Daly continued to get ready for this week’s Masters by increasing the weight on his daily workout routine. He was spotted lifting 16-ounce tall boys to his mouth instead of his usual 12-ounce Budweisers.

— The Big 12 experienced some March Sadness when Oklahoma State lost to Georgia Tech in the Final Four on Saturday night. The Cowboys finally ran into referees who saw their style of play as being less like good, physical defense and more like assault and battery. (On a related note, does Eddie Sutton look exactly like a catfish to anyone else?)

— Even though the Cyclone basketball team lost to Rutgers in the NIT semifinals, ISU fans found some solace in the fact that unlike the Scarlet Knights, they don’t hail from the same state as Jon Bon Jovi.

— And finally, ISU basketball coach Wayne Morgan is expected to spend the offseason recruiting a shooter to replace Jake Sullivan and working on another facial expression to supplement the one he currently has.

That’s all for this week. Tune in next week for a column that will hopefully be a little more focused and a little less likely to steal its title from “The Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn.”