The recent uproar about the Cuffs ruling has turned my brain on in a manner that is uncommon for the week after spring break. For those of you who are easily offended, you may wish to change the channel. I’m actually going to go out on a limb here and say that the ruling was completely justified and everyone should leave Bethany Schuttinga alone.

How dare I make such an assertion. I should be ashamed of myself, I know. This issue doesn’t amount to acceptance. It has nothing to do with unjust discrimination. There is no reference to the First Amendment of the United States Constitution. Incidentally, I think interpreting the First Amendment in such a way that it applies to flogging is a bastardization of the First Amendment. But, I digress. This issue, like many, many others, has to do with money and how it is managed — specifically, my money and how other people see fit to manage it.

Like most of you, I pay tuition and other mysterious expenses to Iowa State University. I don’t think it’s too much of a logical leap to understand that some of that money goes into student activities, organizations and the upkeep of facilities here on campus. When I pay my money to these things, I expect that it will used effectively. Now that, my friends, is a very ambiguous term. When I say “effectively” I mean simply that I would like my money to be spent on things that can enhance the quality of life at Iowa State. A short list of these things includes quality instruction, janitorial services of buildings, books at the library, those free microwaves in the Union, the computer I’m using to type this e-mail and CyRide. You’ll notice that Cuffs was not on the list.

Sorry, folks, you didn’t make the cut. This is because I don’t feel the need to pay for other people’s sexual endeavors. It’s not that I want sadomasochism or its practitioners exterminated from the face of the earth, it’s just that if you want to flog or beat someone sexually or learn to flog or beat someone sexually, don’t ask me to pay for it. Do it on your own time with your own dime.

Then again, I’ve heard of a lot of people getting neck injuries from pleasuring their partner orally. Maybe I should petition for university funding and space to start an oral sex club — strictly for educational purposes.

Stefan Gingerich

Senior

Zoology