When you’re broke, you look for a sale on ramen noodles at HyVee. When you’re really broke, you run to Sam’s Club on Saturday for free sample day.

Atmosphere:

AL: C’mon, it’s a warehouse. But you can shop for new snow tires while you eat, which is a bonus.

ER: If the feel of a cold warehouse is warmer than where you woke up on Saturday morning, Sam’s Club is the place for you. Although I’ve never been to the Grand Canyon, walking in between the aisles at Sam’s Club gave me a close feel to what it would be like. Without a place to sit, or real silverware for that matter, Sam’s Club is not the place to go for its ambiance.

Service:AL: Could we really ask for great service from the sample ladies? Of course we could. It may have been Saturday, which the final-pizza-sliver-distributing Jo-D said was their busiest day, but the lines for most of the samples were way too long. My frustration peaked when I had to line up for a Tyson Honey BBQ Chicken Wing before the little delicacies were even out of the oven. I was also pretty upset by the tiny spoon given with the pot pie soup — after a slimy piece of potato fell off and splattered on my shoe, I’m not sure I’ll be giving my lunchtime patronage to Sam’s Club again.

ER: A wait — we had to wait for samples. We were shocked, and on top of that, we had to avoid being crushed by oversized carts. But once we got past the carts, the samples were served with a smile. Shera didn’t even mind the fact that I took three pieces of pizza, a flagrant violation of sample dining etiquette.

Quantity/Value:

AL: Unless you’re brave, this isn’t all-you-can-eat. However, stopping at each booth once or twice (or three times, in Eric’s case) while keeping in mind that it’s not costing a dime was enough to fill me up for most of the day. The only downside was the multiple pizza samples. Is a little free food variety too much to ask?

ER: With eight different samples to choose from, I was quite happy with the array of choices. The trick is getting more than one sample. You just can’t wait at the sample stand and stuff your face. There’s technique in getting more than one sample from a stand. I usually grab a sample, run off to another stand and come back to the original stand for another one. With the ability to come back for multiple helpings and larger-than-HyVee sample sizes, the quantity during Sam’s sample day gets a high mark. As for the value, coming in as a guest under Aaron’s membership made this lunch date completely free. Who says there’s no such thing as a free lunch? Even when you do have money, everyone could use a free meal.

Quality/Taste:

AL: Most of the mini meals I tried were pretty good, although two really stole the show. The first pizza sample, made with Hormel bacon bits and dough and sauce available in a kit, was a unique appetizer. Also, the aforementioned wings were a tangy main course. I thought they’d make a great late-night snack and picked up a bag, before realizing I shouldn’t spend 12 bucks on junk food. A word of advice — don’t put a product you’ve picked up back on the shelf while the sample lady is watching. You’ll get a really dirty look, which makes going back for a fifth sample out of the question.

ER: Homemade pizza, barbecue wings and soup — this is one hell of a sample day. Now, the fact that the Vegan Boca Burger was way too greasy for health food and the carb-balanced Michael Angelo’s was burnt beyond recognition was a bit disconcerting. All was forgotten when I had another Tyson’s BBQ wing. If you don’t mind pizza oven-quality food, Sam’s Club is your place on the weekends.

Final Say:

AL: 2 of 5 forks

ER: 2 of 5 forks