I hadn’t been to the movies with my mom and brother for a long time. Newly released flicks are out of my budget, and I’d rather be sleeping. So my trip to see “The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen” was quite an adventure for me.

Before we hit the theater, my mother insisted we stopped at Target to grab some cheap candy to sneak in the theater. Yes, we are criminals.

After the excessive amount of bad commercials I could see at home on television, we’d already consumed half a bag of popcorn, most of the SnoCaps and I’d finished my shotglass of free water. The trailers began with what seemed to be an absurdly long preview for J-Lo and Ben’s new movie, “Gigli,” which left me ready to puke up the day’s eatings.

The movie finally started, beginning with a little more class than expected.

The world was on the brink of war because of the evil guy, conveniently named “The Phantom,” looking strikingly similar to horrid rock singer Andrew W.K. of “It’s Time to Party” fame.

Allan Quartermain (Sean Connery) wasn’t sure if he was up for joining this supposed league. Being a head-case blowhard, a recruiter finally gets him to join by stating, “The empire needs you.”

“What a great line,” I thought to myself.

But honestly, Connery has no credibility thanks to Darrell Hammond’s impersonation on “Saturday Night Live.”

Every time he said a line, I just chuckled, thinking of Hammond’s “Celebrity Jeopardy” riff, “Rough like your mother likes it, Trebek!”

A few of the characters were developed nicely. Captain Nemo (Naseeruddin Shah) had a rockin’ costume and a killer beard. He was a pirate, but a friendly one with an impressive ship.

The League also includes Dorian Gray (Stuart Townsend), pretty foxy; Tom Sawyer (Shane West), the lame and dumb American the film could have done without; Rodney Skinner (Tony Curran), oooh he’s invisible; the female of the movie, Mina Harker (Peta Wilson), a foxy vampiress, was one of the more impressive characters and Dr. Jekyl/Mr. Hyde (Jason Flemyng) created by some bad computer graphics.

There are lots of visually stimulating fight scenes with questionable computer graphics. I wasn’t expecting anything spectacular, but I was occasionally quite impressed. I suppose this movie would be worth your money at the dollar theater. It’s just another summer movie with some action and pretty faces.

Yes, Sean Connery has the prettiest face of them all, right? Right?

Honestly, my experience after the movie was more entertaining than anything in “The League.” With my mother in the back smiling contentedly, and my brother to my right, I drove our shiny, white, new-to-us ’95 station wagon out of the parking lot.

As I left, I noted the only car left in the Aldi parking lot had a slightly overweight couple making out next to it like he was going off to war.

Time to party, indeed.

— Ramona Muse