Whenever you meet someone for the first time, you automatically form an impression of that person — first impression, if you will. Their body shape, the clothes they wear, the way they talk, walk and breathe — all are taken into account when forming your first impression of someone. And as a result, you come away thinking some of the greatest people in the world, like me, are complete idiots.

Regardless of what I’m doing, saying, or wearing, you will walk away after our first meeting thinking, “What a pathetic excuse of a man.” Maybe it’s the numerous cowlicks in my hair or my albino-like skin tone. (I am actually white enough to glow in the dark.) Maybe it is the tenacious sarcasm that drips from many of my comments or the fact that sometimes I don’t say anything at all. (I can be kind of shy for a really loud, sarcastic person.)

Or it could be related to my amazing ability to say highly unintelligent things very loudly at that exact instant an entire lecture hall falls silent. Maybe it’s because I never really discovered a way to suavely stroll from one class to another, but instead amble about, occasionally running into fixed objects. It could be due to my clothing selection, as I have the fashion sense of a tree, or that I apparently always appear to be stoned.

What is important is that I’m not a pathetic excuse for a man (those of you who know me, please don’t interject) and that your first impression about me was incorrect. The permanent image you formed of me in your brain mere moments after I entered the classroom may not be a completely accurate portrait of who I am at all. But you would never know that because you have already written me off.

There are a lot of people like me. We just can’t make a good first impression. It’s something that we have learned to live with. I mean, what else can we do? I know that 95% of people are going to not like me after our first meeting. It wouldn’t be so bad if first impressions weren’t built up to mean so much.

Think about it: You come into contact with a person for only a matter of minutes and you automatically think you can accurately judge so much about him or her. It’s absurd when you think about it, but nonetheless, all people do it. Even those of us who always make bad first impressions fall into this trap. I try not to use my first impression to judge people because I know how that can keep me from really getting a chance to know people, but it’s an uphill battle. I’m still trying to break my habit of assuming that I should not even waste my time with anyone I label as “female.”

This emphasis on first impressions is embraced throughout our society. Hence, we have a huge emphasis on clothing and the way a person looks. And it seems to be especially strong in the college setting. College students are old enough to have had their childhood “everything is beautiful” mindset crushed, yet still young enough to still firmly believe in the illusion that we can change the way we look. We are caught in that in-between period where it is painfully obvious how appearance influences all that we do.

But why? Why should albino, sarcastic, fashion-impaired people like myself be held down by the bad first impression we will surely make?

We do not have to allow first impressions to count for so much in our lives. We do not have to endorse an atmosphere where women are starving themselves to look like poles and men are pounding weights and various muscle supplements to bulge out of their shirts. We do not have to judge the person sitting beside you on the “merits” of his shoes or her shirt, her car or his apartment. I’ll even go so far as to say that you shouldn’t judge a person by his or her major (even if we all know that you can never trust an advertising major). I’m not anti-weight lifting. I’m not opposed to owning nice vehicles or wearing designer clothing. And I’m not trying to make a self-serving plea because I don’t feel loved or am fundamentally unattractive. If you want to buy a new pair of shoes or go on a diet, by all means go ahead. Just make sure you’re doing it for yourself, not so you look better in the eyes of someone else.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t form a first impression of people you meet. Quite honestly, I think it is out of our hands. Your mind automatically begins classifying a person as soon as they enter your range of existence, and I don’t think that can be altered. Instead, I think we have to change the role first impressions play in examining the people around us.

First impressions should no longer be used as the definition of who a person is. Rather, they should be used only as initial observations in your effort to learn about someone else, the first step in a process.

Otherwise, you will continue to miss out on meeting great guys like me. And that’s a real shame.

Dustin Kass

is a junior in journalism

and mass communication from Dubuque.