So the music industry is pretty bummed over the recent slump in record sales. They really don’t have anyone to blame but themselves.

I’m sure releasing rehashed compilation shit like “Now! 9” and “Totally Hits 2002” had throngs of fans running down to Target. And if those titles didn’t, cowboys and gangstas alike were probably pulling copies of Kenny Chesney and Eminem furiously from the shelves, respectively.

Although all of the aforementioned reside in this week’s top ten, one has to ask just where is the rock.

Sure, some of you might find it further down the list with titles like Nickelback, Creed and Linkin Park, but not all of us drive bitchin’ Camaros or two-tone Monte Carlos. No offense, but there has to be an outlet somewhere for the rest of us interested in more rock than cock.

Enter Buddyhead.com.

For those unfamiliar with the content of Buddyhead, it’s about to become your favorite online magazine you’ve never read . maybe.

This cyberpublication is the brainchild of founders Travis Keller and Aaron North, two twentysomethings from Los Angeles intent on being “a thorn in the side of the purveyors of cultural genocide.” Think of Alternative Press (when it was actually alternative) published by the minds of 15-year-olds.

That’s right, lots of potty language, false stories and more sordid gossip than a sewing circle. These traits have garnered the attention of more than just the high school principal. With millions of readers, music execs and celebrities alike have reason to fear their names showing up on Buddyhead’s very popular “gossip page.”

Here’s some recent examples:

“Call up Rikki Rocket from Poison and ask him to Talk Dirty to You. xxx.510.3170.”

“Brandy is now a baby’s mama. We didn’t do it.”

“That new Papa Roach song fuckin sucks and it’s always on. We’re going to fucking kill someone pretty soon.”

“Mike Tyson wants to eat your children. R. Kelly wants to bang your children.”

“The McRib is back. Shaq Pack is over.”

What some may see as juvenile is actually a small battalion of youths putting the fun back into the media.

Most music magazines include album reviews. Buddyhead is no exception. But they critique discs with a little more style and flavor than the run-of-the-mill Rolling Stone issue.

While most periodicals give stars or a numerical rating, Buddyhead assigns various images of Axl Rose. A five-star album is slapped with a picture of Axl holding a Mike McGill skateboard: “He plans on ripping it up in his drained pool while he listens to this album and rides this board.”

Poor reviews, which most albums are, show Axl driving an ATV: “Axl was so disgusted by this record, he took it out to his backyard and drove his dune buggy over it.”

Most of the reviews are short, sweet and to the point. Unfortunately, Lisa Loeb’s “Cake and Pie” nabbed a dune buggy Axl shot. Keller wrote, “Cake and Pie just might also be the reason we only get to see Lisa from the neck up this album. Hmmm…”

A respectable slick would include several columns. Buddyhead does as well, but they are anything but respectable.

Readers might be quick to check out Buddyhead scams for a “feature [that] relies on input from Buddyhead readers on their favorite methods of “fucking the man.”

Others interested in boys and girls can scroll through Buddyhead Sex Advice. Sex columnist Marko wrote a very patriotic introduction post-9/11: “If you don’t have sex with everything that has a pulse or a breasted object that sometimes jiggles, then the terrorists win!!!”

For the slightly pervy music fan with an appetite for a fresh outlook on the entertainment industry, I warn you, this site is very addictive. Much of the archive pages are unavailable due to high traffic and limited bandwidth for lack of funds. They do accept donations.

North sums up Buddyhead quite simply, stating in the recent issue’s introduction, “Nobody wants to make waves because opening their mouth would cost them their career. We are not careerists, and have nothing to offer but honesty.”

Boonie Boone is a senior in pre-journalism and mass communication from Madrid. He hopes Buddyhead doesn’t steal his soul for pinching some material from the page.