One would be hard-pressed to find another casual “hangout” where things just happen from time to time. Tuesday you walk in and the guys are planning to scour the tri-county area for garden tractors with hopes of making modified go-karts. Thursday’s interests have turned to racing `round the shop on bicycles fit for Verne Troyer (Mini-Me). But every day the line “What do ya wanna eat?” resonates inside the one-time beauty salon turned newly remodeled tattoo parlor. More than once you’re likely to hear the slightly slurred, quick retort from shop grommet, Cory: “I dunno!”

Those who have walked by or stopped in may have experienced this nonstop entertainment. Go ahead and run with the idea that it’s all fun, all the time. Sure, you’re likely to have your bad days every once in a while, but these guys do one helluva job keeping the kids inked and pierced, not only in town but also in a substantial surrounding area. Owners Hugo Kenemer and Hot Rod comment on their trade, clientele and the Shriners one afternoon, pre-lunch.

* Note – Hot Rod stated at the beginning of the interview that his answer to every question would be “I cannot recall,” alluding to an older episode of “Oz.” After a few questions though, he decided to play with the rest of the group and spout some knowledge.

Boonie Boone: How long have you been tattooing?

Hugo Kenemer: I don’t know . nine years.

BB: What inspired this line of work?

HK: I just kinda fell into it, zero inspiration. Friends asked me to tattoo them. I remember being in junior high and having older guys ask me to tattoo them.

BB: What keeps your job interesting?

HK: It would have to be the customers . especially the freaky people that come in.

BB: Who’s the freakiest?

HK: People that want their genitals pierced and shit like that.

BB: Have you ever had any interesting accidents or memorable occasions?

HK: We had a girl pass out and wet herself, along with her girlfriend’s purse. Bodily functions when people pass out never cease to amaze me.

Hot Rod: I had a frat guy poop himself. I was tattooing him and he kept saying he had to go to the bathroom. I told him, `Hold on, I only have two lines left’ and then I smelled what I thought was a fart, but it didn’t go away. I finished up and he ran to the bathroom and was in there for quite a while. When he walked out of the rest room, he headed out the door without saying goodbye.

HK: I was stretching the earlobes on a friend of mine and he started to get lightheaded. He headed to the rest room as well for a while. He was in there for a long time and then we heard a crash like something had fallen. I tried opening the door but could only open it about six inches. Something was lodged between the door and the wall; peering through the crack I could see it was his head. So I pushed [it] as hard as I could and got in there and picked him up. All of a sudden he woke up and looked at me like “What are you doing?” I told him, “You were the fucker that passed out with your pants at your ankles.”

BB: Ever have any pukers?

HK: We have pukers every once in a while.

BB: So who represents your clientele?

HK: Normal college kids seeking to express themselves.

BB: Describe normal.

HK: Just average people. We tattoo a wide range of people. We just had some managers of an electrical crew from Mason City in getting some work done. The next person may be some dirty hippie kid. The thing about dirty hippies is that they don’t think they’re dirty because the next hippie down the line is dirtier.

BB: Have you ever tattooed anyone famous?

HK: Despite requests, I will not tattoo any famous people.

HR: I tattooed a guy who we thought was on “America’s Most Wanted.”

BB: Are you known for a certain style of ink-slinging?

HK: I command control of all styles of tattooing.

HR: I’m pretty good at tattooing in the dark.

BB: If you weren’t tattooing, would you be out scaring little kids or just working a normal 9-to-5?

HK: I would be scaring kids … people always think I’m scary.

BB: I thought you were when I first met you.

HK: See.

BB: Is there a tattoo or piercing the shop refuses to do?

HK: I won’t do any swastikas or that shit . no racial hate stuff.

BB: How would you like to be viewed by the fine citizens of this community?

HK: As “The Grand Poobah of Tattooing.”

HR: I want to be known as one of those Shriner car drivers.

HK: How about “Se¤or Chapstick?”

HR: Actually, I’d like to be known as a superhero sidekick. They have superhero status, but get to sit back and drink beer all day.

BB: Like “Fallout Boy?”

HR: Yeah.