I am looking for a man. It would be perfect if he had brown hair, glasses and a cute little stocking cap. And a red and white striped shirt would be really sexy.

OK, I am not searching for a guy and this is not a description of the man of my dreams. I am looking for Waldo. You know, the cartoon that wears spectacles and a striped shirt that hides amazingly well. The guy whose books feature multiple two-page spreads where he hides among things such as carnivals, pyramids and circus freaks like the bearded lady.

I love the Waldo books. I have always been fascinated with how well the artists can hide him. When I was little I would spend hours finding each little Waldo in the book. Then I would go to the back and find all the things on the checklist for each age. I was addicted to Waldo. The whole book mesmerized me.

Of course it was a rare occasion that I had Waldo books. They are pretty expensive for a children’s book. Currently they are selling for about $15.99, plus tax. I think there may have been three total floating around my house. Eventually as I grew up I hunted for Waldo less and almost completely forgot about him.

Waldo has recently been reintroduced into my life. My new roommate this semester has a version of Waldo that I have yet to explore. I keep restraining myself from looking at it though because I know once I start I will not be able to stop searching for Waldo. I have more important things to do, like studying for example.

Actually I was even reminded of Waldo the other day. I was doing some research online and I kept seeing this poll. However, the question was not “Where is Waldo?” The poll wanted to know “Where is Osama bin Laden?” The survey gave sample answers for his location such as Tora Bora, Pakistan and even dead.

With Waldo on my mind I just could not resist the mental connection to bin Laden. I even started to fuse their images. Suddenly bin Laden had on a turban, round glasses and that fashionable red and white striped T-shirt. The picture was amusing to say the least.

Yet as funny as bin Laden looking like a candy cane was, I could not help but let fear creep into my brain.

My first thought was that bin Laden was not a cartoon like Waldo. I also realized Waldo is completely harmless. We know all to well that bin Laden is a threat to our national security. None of us will ever forget what happened on Sept. 11.

The idea of the checklist is also a little alarming. What would be on the “Where is Osama bin Laden?” checklist? I imagine it would be things like terrorist training camps, future attack plans, bunkers full of chemical weapons and recruiting pamphlets to join the anti-American holy war.

But most of all I shudder when I imagine the searching grounds. Waldo is on one of two pages. Bin Laden could be anywhere in the world. Now he is starting to resemble the game “Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego” as opposed to Waldo. Who says bin Laden is even in the Middle East? He could be in Antarctica for all we know. There is a lot of anti-American sentiment out there and he could certainly use that to his advantage to hide practically where ever he wants.

We really have no idea where bin Laden is. I like to picture bin Laden in Waldo-wear next to the bearded lady, but it does not remove the terror. Like Waldo is anywhere on the page, bin Laden could be anywhere in the world. I hope the government and the armed forces are as good at finding bin Laden as I am at finding Waldo.

As far as the poll goes, I answered he is dead. I hope he is, buried somewhere in his red and white striped shirt.

Ayrel Clark is a freshman in pre-journalism and mass communication from Johnston.