You know, it got me thinking. Opening Day is only two days away, and only ten autumns ago, the Minnesota Twins were World Series champs.

It’s sad. You’ll never see the Twins win another one under baseball’s current financial market gap.

Baseball, unlike other pro sports, does not have a salary cap. So money is THE factor if you wanna play in October.

In baseball, the rich get richer while the poor lose games.

Last year, the World-Series-winning New York Yankees’ team salary was a MLB-high of $92,538,260.

The Twins team salary was $16,519,500.

To put it another way, if teams and their success were wine, the Yankees would be a Cabernet Sauvignon Reserve and the Twins would be a Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Hence, you will never see the Twins win another World Series.

Which also got me thinking: What else will you never see in sports?

You will never see Michael Jordan lap up competition again in the NBA.

According to Sports Illustrated columnist Rick Reilly, Jordan and his anonymous source are “90 percent” sure he’ll come back next season and play for the league minimum for the Washington Wizards, the team he partly owns.

But it is a well-known fact – that MJ spends less time at Wizards games than in Jerry Reinsdorf’s office chatting.

If he doesn’t even watch them, he won’t play for them.

You will never see good baseball teams care about spring training.

Last pseudo-season, the Yanks finished 13-21. We know what happened next.

The Astros finished 20-11 in the spring, and they went on to be completely forgotten.

You will never see umpires change their strike zones.

So quit writing about it. Quit talking about it.

Last April, the objective zone (just below the chest, just above the knees, across the width of the plate) was promised to be enforced by umps.

By July, like every July before it, some umps’ strike zones were from the left to the right seam of the ball, while others’ were from the left to the right field of the park.

Get used to more of the same.

You will never see another Super-Bowl-winning-quarterback-turned-free agent like Trent Dilfer.

Nobody wants to sign the former Raven.

He shows Tampa Bay his ring. The Bucs’ show him the door.

The reason? The arm that lies behind the ring has trouble hitting a target.

Dilfer threw 12 touchdown passes this season. And 11 picks.

Plus, Tampa Bay and other teams are smart. The Ravens’ defense won the Super Bowl.

Owners know that Dilfer had about as much to do with it as `N Sync’s halftime show did.

You will never see Ricky Henderson retire.

The 42-year-old has agreed to a deal with the San Diego Padres, according to cnnsi.com. He is two walks away from breaking Babe Ruth’s walk record.

You will never see Ricky Henderson break the record for most walks in a career.

He’s 42, remember. Hell of a long way down to first.

You will never see ISU wrestler Cael Sanderson lose.

Ever.

You will never see Tiger Woods in a slump.

Going 14 starts without a win does not constitute a slump.

You want a slump?

Ben Crenshaw, the ’95 Masters champion, hasn’t won since (95 starts).

His best finish last year was a tie for 77th at the GTE Byron Nelson. In ’99, he started 13 tournaments. He didn’t make a cut.

Slump this, Tiger naysayers.

You will never see Americans froth at the mouth at Brazil’s 1-0 win over Argentina in World Cup Play.

Why?

Because it took 90 minutes for the fullbacks, halfback and humpbacks from Brazil to win 1-0.

The only way I’m watching soccer for 90 minutes is if U.S. World Cupper Brandi Chastain runs around wearing only her Nike sports bra.

The Twins should pick her up. She could boost ratings.

Paul Kix is a sophomore in journalism and mass communication from Hubbard.