Welcome to the XFL, or Xtremely Funny League — what a joke! I admit that I gave this new league a shot at winning my viewership last Saturday night during its debut. They held my attention for all of three minutes. My father, who enjoys sports, was watching with me, and neither of us had a problem changing the channel. I bet Vince McMahon, who founded this league as well as the WWF, would have liked me to believe that by changing the channel, I might possibly miss the most exciting thing to come along in sports since the shot clock. On the contrary, I didn’t miss a dang thing.The main goal of the XFL is to improve the current form of the NFL. Their attempts are futile. The NFL is the granddaddy of all football, and the XFL is just another attempt in a long line of “tried-to-be-better-but-just-couldn’t-do-it” leagues. The Canadian Football League, the Arena League, even NFL Europe have never come close to establishing a fan base that is anywhere near the NFL’s.The XFL has brought about a few changes to the game of football, but what they lack is football itself. They are so caught up in turning the game into a show that they forgot about getting decent talent. That is the prime thing that makes the league so irritating. They collected a bunch of football washouts who are lacking the necessary talent for the big time and threw them into a league that is supposed to rival the NFL. I have never heard so much trash talk from guys who had no business opening their mouths. In this extreme, the WWF has too much claim on this new startup.The introductions of the players would have been enough to make me change the channel, but I wanted to hold on for a little while to see what kind of football was going to be played. Each player got a camera stuck in their face to tell the crowd and those watching at home who they were and who’s momma they were going to make look bad. Every player gleefully stepped into the spotlight and took their turn at looking like an idiot. One player had “HE HATE ME” on the back of his jersey instead of his name. What in the world is that about?Along with the camera being in the players’ faces, it is also everywhere else you could think of. This is suppose to be a selling point but it backfired. I am sure most of the male viewing audience appreciated the cheerleader “cleavage cam” shots between every play, but were quickly turned off by the locker room camera. A head coach was giving a pep talk, while the players were listening intently and getting worked on by the training staff. This included one extremely obese lineman getting IcyHot rubbed onto his lower back rather vigorously by a male trainer. Those watching from Hooters lost their buffalo wings.Some things can spice up an already-decent product. For instance, the revolving 360 degree camera angles that CBS gave us at the Super Bowl were awesome. The addition of the first down line used by every network has also made watching the game at home that much more enjoyable. The XFL, on the other hand, used a camera angle that just didn’t work last Saturday. They had a camera suspended above the field that gave us a shot from behind the offensive side of the ball. The camera moved with motion on the field, and it might have actually worked if the game wasn’t so horrible.That is the primary reason the league won’t work — it just isn’t good football. It doesn’t matter how many cheerleaders prance around naked or how many different variances are thrown into the mix; if the main part of the league is awful, it won’t work out.The Saturday debut did get decent ratings, but anything more would have been shocking. NBC promoted this thing almost as much as CBS promoted “Survivor.” The difference is that “Survivor” actually has some substance. It is my opinion that NBC will have to do something drastic to keep this league afloat longer. It is also my opinion that they won’t be able to come up with anything better. People just won’t watch glorified high schoolers with attitude problems play sandlot football on a Saturday night when they could go bowling instead.Vince McMahon is without a doubt counting on his loyal minion of WWF followers to latch onto this new enterprise of his — not a bad plan if it worked, but it probably will not. A good friend of mine who is close to obsessed with the WWF thought the XFL was a joke. One viewer down, ten million left before this league goes the way of the dinosaur.What is so wrong with the NFL that people are constantly trying to fix it? I realize that there are quite a few pompous millionaires that are not very viewer friendly in that league, but they can at least back up their proclamations by their play on the field. The fact that the Super Bowl is the most watched event in the world is a clear sign that the NFL is doing just fine. It, like most things in this world, could use some improvements. There are definitely some aspects of the NFL which don’t exactly make you jump out of your team beanbag chair, but even with its flaws, the NFL could beat the XFL in substance every day of the week and twice on Sundays.I do not fault Vince McMahon for trying to be inventive, but I do hold him responsible for once again thinking he can appeal to the lowest common denominator in our human psyche. He is simply trying to duplicate the WWF by transforming it to another sport. Thankfully, the majority of sports fans in this country expect better, and they will not support a league for very long that could be watched in a coma. If the XFL is your thing, I will feel bad for you when it is canceled, but you will still have the WWF, which is probably better. For those who want REAL football, we are only seven months away from watching relatively modestly-dressed cheerleaders, fair catches, quarterbacks taking a knee and last names only on jerseys. I can’t wait!Marcus Charter is a sophomore in journalism and mass communications from Ames.