The hour is fast approaching, and the buzz of anticipation can be heard from coast to coast. Snore.Sunday’s Super Bowl has been predicted by fans and media alike to be a bore. Expect staunch defenses. Expect third-and-eight. And then, expect punts. This is what we’ve been told will happen.The thing is, it won’t be that bad. Sure, we are in store for less scoring than Janet Reno did on prom night, but I can think of worse things for one to watch or to busy oneself with in place of the game.In fact, the following is a list of acts that are far worse than plopping down and counting the times the Ravens’ defense take the field.Watching the Super Bowl beats now blowing the driveway.Watching the Super Bowl beats taking that rare Physics 530 test at 8 in the morning, on the even rarer day of Sunday, with a hangover that would make Dean Martin cringe.Watching the Super Bowl beats having seductive sweet nothings whispered in your ear by tennis diva Anna Kournikova when you are Antonio Todde of Italy, the world’s oldest living man at 112. No matter what she wants to do, there is not a damn thing you can do about it.Watching the Super Bowl beats realizing that I have at least 93 more years before I set a record of any sort.Watching the Super Bowl beats holding up to your end of the bargain with former Carolina Panther Rae Carruth and going to his Super Bowl party that he planned last January.Watching the Super Bowl beats being a Redskins season-ticket holder. You have had your wallet drained so dry by seats only a Rockafeller could afford that for a buck you and your section can listen to the game on your neighbor’s ham radio.Watching the Super Bowl beats living in Washington D.C. and trying to explain to your 5-year old son how come the Wizards seem to possess little magic whatsoever.Watching the Super Bowl beats being the Phoenix Suns guerilla after a poor performance at the game the night before. Your punishment is getting thrown in a 4-by-6 encasement at the local zoo with Molly, the 800-pound guerilla, who thinks she is in love.Watching the Super Bowl beats being kicked off the island of the new “Survivor” series. Your punishment will be steeper than last season’s. You get to play on the defensive line for the Ravens for a couple of plays and find out what real “surviving” is about.Watching the Super Bowl beats hanging out with the Ravens Tony Siragusa the day before the game and helping him pull chicken wings out of his rather fleshy rolls that have made a home for themselves in between the blubber for over a week.I hope the Super Bowl beats the spread. I have the Ravens winning 35-0 on seven defensive touchdowns. Any takers?Paul Kix is a sophomore in journalism and mass communication from Hubbard. It only took 90 minutes for him to write this.