Five times a week someone asks me why I’m so negative or insinuates that I should be more positive or lighten up.

In addition to chronic clinical depression, I’m just not wired that way and wouldn’t really want to be, even if I had the choice.

Shiny, happy people are all the same. By and large, they don’t produce lasting works of art either.

Happy people paint pictures of fruit and write pieces for Reader’s Digest. Nothing that lasts has been created by content people with no demons to motivate them.

You can argue this point if you like and come up with a few examples: Christmas music, hymns and situation comedies.

But for the most part, my point not only stands but is accepted by those who know. Could Van Gogh have painted all that stuff happy?

Not likely.

Once in a while somebody gets it and since we aren’t running letters this week, I thought I would run just one that proved my point.

I wasn’t going to run it originally, but our managing editor, Katie Goldsmith, pointed out that not only do I run all the negative letters I get, but I usually put the most heinous headlines on them to accentuate their negativity.

So here is a letter I like to call:

Greg Jerrett Rocks

You must understand, I don’t write letters. Ever. I am far too apathetic to bother. I suffer from a congenital lack of motivation in general.

Further, I fancy myself an exceptionally insightful person, as such, I usually feel that the rest of the world is not worthy of my opinion. With that preface, I’m sure you all realize the importance of what I am about to say.

Greg Jerrett rocks.

Perhaps it is unfair that I make this judgement right now. I mean, let’s face it, even a lousy football player like Darren Davis looked pretty good while he was playing on some of the lamest football teams ever to limp onto Jack Trice Field.

I started at Iowa State way back in the fall of 1993 and I have been an avid Daily reader ever since my arrival here. In recent history, the Daily editorial staff has been about as solid as Jake Sullivan’s defense.

ISU student journalists really stink. Not only are most of them clueless in terms of addressing compelling topics, many of them seem to have little command of simple writing skills.

I’m not sure who it is who chooses the Daily columnists each year, but judging by the quality of the columns offered in the recent past, it’s probably the same people who hired the last women’s volleyball coach.

Back to Greg Jerrett.

Let’s not take anything away from Greg, just because he’s part of a mostly lousy team. Greg stands out on his own as a thoughtful, insightful and entertaining fellow, and seems easily able to translate these attributes to the written word quite eloquently.

In my seven years as a Daily reader, he is the ONLY person who I make a point to read every single time.

I actually met him once; we were on the same flight to Phoenix. I saw him in the airport terminal before the flight. I introduced myself, and I told him how much I enjoyed his column and appreciated his obvious talent.

His nervous and less-than-enthusiastic response indicated to me that he had me pegged somewhere between a bomb-wielding terrorist and a blatantly homosexual male columnist groupie. That’s OK, though, public relations is not his job, I just wouldn’t recommend that he go on any book signing tours anytime soon.

To Greg, kudos. To the Daily, you really should work harder at finding guys like this.

Chris Koester

Junior

Veterinary medicine

While I appreciate the praise, I do have to correct you Chris. No one stands out without the help of the rest of the staff. I consider myself lucky to work with some very talented college journalists.

If it weren’t for the copy editors, I would look like an even bigger idiot than I normally do.

I learned a great deal early on from the news editors who taught an old dog a trick or two about concise journalistic expression and pointed out Twain, Vonnegut and Hemingway as examples of literary journalists who managed to express themselves in under 1500 words when necessary.

I hire the columnists and their faults are my own.

Not many other majors work as hard as these guys, so don’t think a typo or two amounts to incompetence, because even the big boys misspell a word or two.

I’ve seen our competition and I can tell you we hold our own nicely. Try doing YOUR homework with 26,000 people ragging on you and see how you hold up.

Thanks for the kudos, keep reading and have a great break! How’s that for positive, Chachi?