There is an imbalance in my universe because hate and ignorance somehow took control recently. I was having an incredible time Saturday night when in moments it became the worst time of my now-threatened life.

I was assaulted by hate and ignorance. I was out with my boyfriend and some of his friends at a bar on Welch Ave.

At one point, my boyfriend became upset and left. One of his friends walked out to look for him. I stayed behind with another friend.

As I was sitting on my stool, another man approached me and said, “Hey, your faggot boyfriend just ran outta here pretty mad at you, faggot.”

Out of respect for myself and my boyfriend, I calmly and without anger asked him, “Excuse me, what did you just say to me?” Then he assaulted me.

This man, consumed with hate and ignorance, punched me, knocked me off my stool and continued to throw his fists at me – because I am gay.

Almost immediately, two other bar patrons helped break up the struggle. My attacker was thrown out before I regained my balance. The managers, owners and bartenders were concerned for my safety.

Those are the events. These are the implications.

Even now, I am finding new places that hurt. My head keeps beating like a metronome – a constant reminder of a visit from hate and ignorance.

From my left temple across my skull to the back of my head and down my jaw line and inside my upper ear, I am swelling, and I ache.

My right shoulder is sore and part of my tailbone hurts when I sit. All a direct result of the hate crime inflicted upon me. When hate and ignorance looked on me, you thought you saw vulnerability and weakness. When you verbally abused me, I fought back. I did not shut up. I never will. I am not a student at Iowa State. The man who assaulted me most likely is.

I am an administrator. He could see me walking across campus or working in my office. I could see him.

The battle of hate and ignorance vs. love and compassion is played out on our campus.

This thought exhausts me. On the other hand, the two men who helped me are most likely students too. That helps me.

I just moved to Ames. Part of my transition was realizing the Ames community probably would not support me if hate and ignorance ever tried to penetrate my soul.

I am relieved a couple patrons and the bar’s management proved my expectation wrong. I am not writing this letter for attention.

I am contributing my small influence to the long tradition of gay men and others who have been assaulted, prejudiced and dehumanized.

Hate and ignorance have no place at Iowa State. Hate and ignorance, I will never shut up. Hate and ignorance, I am asking Iowa State and Ames to stand up to you.

Ryan Gildersleeve

Hall director

Birch-Welch-Roberts