Laurie Selwitz’s “Men are from Locker Rooms, Women are from Luxury Boxes: A Woman’s Survival Guide to Understanding Spectator Sports” is a trite but practical look at sports for the novice female trying to figure out what all these complicated, silly sports are all about.

The book’s title is a take off of John Gray’s “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus,” but it is not in the same vein as the best-selling pop psychology book.

This one abandons all hope of meeting in the middle and assumes that if a woman is buying this book, she has already lost the war to get her man away from the tube.

Selwitz gives a practical and humorous overview of all major sports. Her knowledge of the subtleties and vagaries of hockey, baseball and football can turn a virtual amateur into a well-versed pro.

At the very least, the facts gleaned from this book can make sure readers can fake their way through rational discussions of any major sport.

The guide is organized to explain the details so the uninitiated can grasp not only the details of hockey, baseball, football and basketball, but WHY things are done the way they are.

One example is “what it means when they send in a relief pitcher.” Selwitz tells us if it isn’t broken, they wouldn’t be fixing it. That a comfortable lead means no changes, but if one team is up by only a couple of points, a “closer” is often brought in to make sure a win is secure.

These are details not easily explained by sports fans to people who just don’t get it.

Selwitz includes lists of when each season begins and ends, what happens during pre- and post-season, a glossary of definitions, positions and calls and a quiz to make sure you get it right.

This book comes close to pushing a few sexist buttons, but what the hell, it’s all in good humor.

Frankly, there are probably quite a few people, men and women alike, who wouldn’t mind a helpful all-in-one guide.

There’s nothing like a resource book that explains things simply and with humor to fill in those gaps of knowledge.

Once you accept that the whole point of this book is to give women a means of sharing their man’s primary interests even if she has to feign enjoyment, the entire concept is really much funnier.

Selwitz says women can watch sports to see all those cute guys in tight uniforms running around sweating and hitting each other.

With logic like that, what woman wouldn’t want to give it a try?

It isn’t a great read. It’s not Dorothy Parker or anything, but it is competently written, slick and informative.

3 stars

Ratings based on a 5 star scale.

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Greg Jerrett is a graduate student in English from Council Bluffs.