Teen tales, spin-offs and real-to-life-dramas are the name of the game this fall television season. And what a game it looks to be.

Here’s a breakdown of the four main network’s new shows:

ABC

“Odd Man Out,” Fridays 8:30 p.m.

What do you know? Another TGIF laugh-a-minute bonanza. Does anybody ever really watch this stuff? Didn’t think so. But anyway, this one stars Erik von Detten as Andrew, the only male in a house full of women. Too bad CBS already thought of the premise for its fall lineup, and it’s just as bad.

“Oh Grow Up,” Wednesdays 8:30 p.m.

What’s worse than a bunch of irresponsible, dirty college guys? A bunch of irresponsible, dirty 30-year-olds who still act like they’re in college. Just to let you know, this sitcom is laugh-out-loud funny. But so far, the Playstation gets more screen time than the talking dog. At least it’s true to life.

“Once and Again,” Tuesdays 9 p.m.

If being produced by the makers of “thirtysomething” and “My So-Called Life” and starring two incredibly good looking co-stars isn’t enough to make an hour-long drama successful, how about the fact that the show is actually good? Rick Sammler (Bill Campbell) and Lily Manning (Sela Ward) star as two divorced parents having a go at the dating scene for the first time in over a decade.

At first, the same old divorced parent clich‚s seem to take over, but then things start to get good when on the second date, Manning’s kids and ex-husband catch the middle-aged pair in a compromising position.

“Snoops,” Sundays 8 p.m.

Lawyers, cops and teenagers — they’ve all been done before. What to do? What to do? We’ll just get a few girls and a guy and make them private investigators. They can spend all their time playing pranks on each other instead of solving crimes. As long as the chicks are hot, everyone will watch.

CBS

“Judging Amy,” Tuesdays 9 p.m.

Just when it looked as though new legal dramas had gone the way of the dinosaur, court is once again in session. Amy Brenneman of “NYPD Blue” brings new meaning to the phrase, “Judge not lest you be judged.” The newly robed honorable Judge Amy Gray can’t escape the criticism of her chat-room-obsessed mother (Tyne Daly) no matter how hard she tries.

Based on the real-life story of Brenneman’s own mom, the overly-hyped series screams with potential but can’t manage to get past the boredom of the characters’ everyday lives. Come on, someone’s got to throw the audience a bone here. If boring got ratings, everyone and their mother would have her own show.

“Ladies Man,” Mondays 7:30 p.m.

Pop quiz: How many failed sitcoms has Sharon Lawrence starred in since her bare-assed days on “NYPD Blue?” Answer: Too many and still counting.

The newest in the actress’ long line of under-achievements is appropriately titled. The only male character, played by Alfred Molina, gets about three lines per half hour, each of which is comprised of a stupid-sounding, “What did I do?” You made the mistake of taking this gig. Sucks to be you.

“Now and Again,” Fridays 9 p.m.

No one’s sure whether this show is going to be good or not. It definitely has a chance. But the one thing everyone does know is that they’re quite confused. For starters, CBS is hyping this “Quantum Leap” type series as an “action-comedy-drama-romance.”

Why not hire a bearded lady and pitch a tent? Then they could charge admission. To make the situation even harder to grasp, a freak accident leaves John Goodman’s brain alive. That’s the good news. The bad news is now his brain will be transplanted by the government into a superhuman body, and he’s allowed no contact with his family. Ouch. That’s gotta ruin a guy’s day.

FOX

“Action,” Thursdays 8:30 p.m.

Who knew that a smart-ass, conceited Hollywood producer and his former hooker sidekick could make it on prime time? Throw in a few carefully bleeped swear words, and FOX has a sure hit on its hands.

Jay Mohr takes his Bob Sugar character down a few nasty notches and mutates into the love-to-hate-him Peter Dragon, possibly the most selfish bastard to enter our TV warped brains since … well … OK, this one’s a first. But how refreshing: a man who’s proud of being scum.

“Get Real,” Wednesdays 8 p.m.

Is it possible to have too much of something for everyone? This is the question tackled by FOX in its new hour-long series, which attempts to solve the problems of everyone from the high-school freshman to the live-in grandma. The appeal of “Get Real” is exactly that —the realism of life at 15, 45 and even 65. Buck up, kids. It doesn’t get any easier after this.

“Malcolm in the Middle,” Sundays 6 p.m.

The “other network” may have finally found its diamond in the ruff with the everyday adventures of 9-year-old genius Malcolm. The boy’s family is definitely abnormal and the sitcom showcases the ability of kids to see through the bull and realize what’s important in life, even if things aren’t so normal.

“Manchester Prep,” Thursdays 7 p.m.

There’s already been a movie version of the classic “Dangerous Liasons.” It was only a matter of time before television took a stab.

This time around, the overly-friendly stepbrother Sebastian Valmont (Robin Dunne) relishes in a love-hate relationship with rich stepsister Kathryn (Amy Adams). But it remains to be seen if audiences will tune in every week to see the creepy saga unfold.

NBC

“Cold Feet,” Fridays 9 p.m.

The best and worst thing about Friday’s new pick-me-up show is that it’s amazingly cuter than “Friends.” Instead of Phoebe’s ditziness and Chandler’s dry humor, we get six Rosses and Rachels and their annoying addictions to each other. Before the season’s end, these six should find their own identities, and then we’ll be in business. Until then, keep the remote nearby.

“Freaks and Geeks,” Saturdays 7 p.m.

Too bad this ’80s version of “The Wonder Years” got handed such a crappy time slot. This is possibly one of the most intelligent high school dramas to come along in more than a few years. Lindsay Weir (Linda Cardellini as the “freak”) and her brother Sam (John Daley as the “geek”) are two struggling high school students.

Besides Sam’s threat of a bully and Lindsay’s mission to protect the less fortunate, they have a father who threatens them with death. Right now, Sam’s only goal is to survive through puberty.

“The Mike O’Malley Show,” Tuesdays 8:30 p.m.

In this creatively titled comedy from the man who brought us “The Drew Carey Show,” the extremely original Mike O’Malley plays himself, a 30-year-old manchild trying to become more responsible, while staying proficient at wisecracks. Too bad nothing he has to say is funny.

The only character to get laughs is the slacker roommate Weasel (Mark Rosenthal), who fires off lines such as “Aaron Spelling called. Tori needs her haircut back.” Everyone else is stuck with stinkers from two-year-old movies, such as “You had me at hello.” A safer bet would be on “The Weasel Show.”

“Stark Raving Mad,” Thursdays 8:30 p.m.

Where the hell did this come from? It looks like the NBC food service guy accidentally tossed “Frasier,” a bad Stephen King novel and a couple of sitcom castaways into the blender. Out poured “Stark Raving Mad,” and NBC decided since it wasn’t edible, they’d try to pawn it off as Must See TV. Sorry, a piece of crap stuck between two hit shows doesn’t make it good — just decorated crap.

“Third Watch,” Sundays 7 p.m.

This is easily the most hyped drama of the season and with good reason. From the award-winning producers of “ER” comes another true-to-life drama, this time from the views of firefighters, cops and paramedics.

The various teams reside across the street from each other, work together and sometimes even sleep together. So it doesn’t take a genius to figure out where the storylines will come from. Soap opera potential plus burning buildings equals another hit for the peacock network.

“The West Wing,” Wednesdays 8 p.m.

This star-studded look at the oval office teased viewers by offering virtually no clips in promos, only the appropriate Tears for Fears tune, “Everybody Wants to Rule the World.”

The taunting continues as the premiere episode flashes between important White House personnel being beeped with the mysterious message, “Potus in bicycle accident.”

Potus stands for President of the United States, and his aides have to run because the leader of the free world ran himself into a tree. And Clinton thinks he’s got problems with cigars. Watch for this one to be the sure hit of the season.

WB

“Angel,” Tuesdays 8 p.m.

Just to clear things up for non-“Buffy” fans, Angel was Buffy’s only true love and also a 200-year-old vampire. How’s that for a troubled relationship?

Now Angel (David Boreanz) is off on his own and fighting crime. There’s nothing like the age-old tale of the vampire with a heart of gold. WB is counting on this one to be its big hit of the season, and the network can probably rest easy that “Angel” will bring home the bacon.

“Jack & Jill,” Sundays 8 p.m.

This is a complicated one, but try to follow along. In this season’s “Will & Grace” (complete with cute little “and” symbol), the girl plays Jack, and the guy plays Jill.

No, it’s not a twisted cross-dresser series. David “Jill” Jilefsky (Ivan Sergei) and Jacqueline “Jack” Barrett (Amanda Peet) play off each other and occasionally make plays for each other in this all too predictable new series. Bonus: If the show gets boring just play spot-the-former-MTV-veejay and keep an eye out for the long-lost Simon Rex.

“Mission Hill,” Fridays 7 p.m.

The new animated series from the writers of “The Simpsons” moves away from Springfield and into the big city.

Aspiring 24-year-old cartoonist Andy French (voiced by Wallace Langham) is doing fine on his own until his parents decide to move to Wyoming and he inherits his 17-year-old brother Kevin (voiced by Scott Menville).

The show might have a shot with no real competition on Friday night, but its downfall could be Kevin’s character, which sounds like the evil reincarnation of Steve Urkel.

“Popular,” Thursdays 7 p.m.

Get ready to go back to high school again. Remember what it was like to be in the “out” crowd and secretly want to trade beauty secrets with the popular girls? Yeah, aren’t memories a bitch?

Carly Pope plays a teen journalist struggling to find herself in this surefire teen fest. It’s a day-by-day struggle between the good and evil that roams the halls of Kennedy High. Whatever, Alicia.

“Roswell,” Wednesdays 8 p.m.

“The X-Files” must be proud. They now have their very own teen copycat. Except the twist in this alien happy city of Roswell, N.M. is that the starring kids are aliens themselves. But don’t fear. These ET’s are the friendly type.

Come on, all they want to do is fit in with the normal kids. The verdict is still out on whether they can pull this one off.

“Safe Harbor,” Mondays 8 p.m.

What’s up with dysfunctional families and large bodies of water? In the tradition of “Baywatch” and “Dawson’s Creek,” the WB once again brings us the plight of everyday people trying to make it in this crazy world.

Gregory Harrison plays the part of John Loring, a single father trying to make sense of his teenage kids with the help of his mother, played by former Golden Girl Rue McClanahan. The drama promises to achieve popularity with the Midas touch of Aaron Spelling, but it may just be too much of a “Dawson” rip-off to stay afloat.

Late Bloomers

For some reason, the networks are making us hold our breath for these newcomers.

ABC

“Wasteland,” Thursdays 7 p.m.

Season Premiere: Oct. 7

Teen scribe Kevin Williamson leaves “Dawson’s Creek” to tell the story of six twentysomethings in New York City. Hmmm … ring a bell?

FOX

“Ally,” Tuesdays 7 p.m.

Season Premiere: Sept. 28

This is a bit confusing, but here’s an explanation. In each “Ally McBeal” episode, three or four storylines all connect together. “Ally” explores already-told storylines even more deeply and gives each its own half-hour. Stop pinching yourself. This nightmare is for real.

“Harsh Realm,” Fridays 8 p.m.

Season Premiere: Oct. 8

Thomas Hobbes (Scott Bairstow) takes on a military mission into a virtual reality world that he soon realizes he cannot escape.

“Ryan Caulfield: Year One,” Fridays 7 p.m.

Season Premiere: Oct. 15

This new and surprisingly original take on the law-enforcement world follows rookie beat cop Ryan Caulfield (Sean Maher) on his journeys both on and off the streets.

“Time of Your Life,” Mondays 7 p.m.

Season Premiere: Oct. 25

Sarah is actually leaving Bailey and the popular series “Party of Five” for more upscale digs in New York.

In her new spin-off, Sarah Merrin (Jennifer Love Hewitt) ventures into the Big Apple in hopes of finding her biological father. We’ll see if she finds herself trailing back to “Party” with her tail between her legs.