Rushed columns suck worse than blown football games, but like Iowa State, I suck every now and then.

They usually tend to wander from line to line, not really making any thing close to a point.

They have dumb errors like crediting Men At Work for “The Safety Dance” instead of Men Without Hats, and they are stocked with bad jokes.

And they always have one thing in common — a good excuse.

The rush today is to get down to People’s for the 35″ Mudder/Mr. Plow/Deviant/Custom show.

I haven’t been this pumped for a local gig since Boner played “Ice Ice Baby” on acoustic guitar.

It is not often that four of the hottest acts in Ames share the same stage. Hot as in talented, of course.

I’ve always called 35″ Mudder the heaviest band I’ve ever seen, and in this case, I am talking physically.

These are some big dudes. If you’re not a fan already, you will be just based on fear of what would happen if you weren’t.

35″ Mudder have been playing as long as I’ve been at the Iowa State Daily, if that gives you any indication of their experience.

They have a national manager — former Tears For Fears member Curtis Smith — who wants to make 35″ Mudder the next band to “rule the world.”

And though 35″ Mudder seem close to inking a record deal, they’re not letting up on songwriting.

Former hated Daily columnist and Mudder bassist Chad Calek phoned me at 8:30 a.m. this morning to play some newly recorded material, and it was so tight I almost forgave him for waking me up.

35″ Mudder won’t be playing many more club shows, so any chance to see them now is golden.

On the opposite end of the physical spectrum is Mr. Plow. These guys — at least the rappers — are the skinniest dudes around.

They get more chicks than the Backstreet Boys, and their record isn’t even out yet. But fellow Daily writer Sam “Sammy J” Johnson played their upcoming new release for me a few weeks ago, and it blows away “Millennium.”

Mr. Plow has an edge on other local bands in Ubong — the first fro-sporting drummer since the disco era. In recent shows, this ultra fly funkblaster has stepped up to the mic and impressed.

The Plowstreet Boys are hosting a CD release party at People’s on Oct. 9.

The Deviant dudes are not quite as monstrous as Mudder, but I wouldn’t bad mouth their mothers.

These guys are the local band most likely to make the increasingly popular Insane Clown Posse crossover move into the WCW.

Deviant played in the early afternoon of last year’s Veishea Battle of the Bands and gave the crowd and judges a killer wake-up call.

Fellow journalism student “Troj” tells me Deviant are recording their debut next weekend.

Custom weighs in well under their music scene peers with only three members, but their sound is more complex than your basic rock trio.

These dudes are from my neighborhood and are like family to me.

They came onto the scene a year ago as a foursome, but ditched their former frontman, who looked more like a Backstreet Boy than anyone in Mr. Plow.

Custom is the local band with the most noise ordinance tickets, and inside sources say their last few practices have ventured into a cover of Ugly Kid Joe’s “I Hate Everything About You.”

Or is it “Safety Dance?”

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Corey Moss is a senior in journalism and mass communication from Urbandale.