One thing that is true about Americans on the whole is that they don’t even know what they want. Take the First Amendment.

You can’t fling a cat without hitting someone in favor of free speech. Yet polls show Americans are in favor of all kinds of censorship — including anti-flag burning amendments.

For all our talk about protecting our freedoms, we’re more interested in keeping ourselves from being inconvenienced. Let’s be honest, we’re all in favor of our own freedom of speech, but how many of us actually want to hear what other people have to say?

Truth be told, most people are idiots. For example, at most any outdoor concert, you will see flash bulbs going off everywhere. Look on the box people, the damn thing is only good for 20 feet!

But back to my point, regardless of how intelligent someone else’s form of expression is, we generally don’t want to hear it. In fact, some are so pervasively unpopular, that there is actually legislation against them.

Remember poor old 2 Live Crew? Those poor guys ignited a whole debate about the need to censor obscene material in music.

Ever since there has been a standardized federal warning on albums containing “explicit” material. This saves parents the chore of actually listening to the music to see if they find it objectionable.

It’s amazing how many “free speech” advocates have no problems with this. We all have different thresholds in terms of obscenity, so it seems ridiculous to single anything out.

As the great George Carlin pointed out, of the hundreds of thousands of words in the English language, there are only seven you can’t say on television. (Although he later revised the list to include around a dozen). But those words would have to be outrageous to justify being excluded from such a large group. The whole idea of “bad words” is ridiculous.

Nevertheless, some people have made careers of rooting out obscenity. If Tipper Gore had her way, the only things any of us would be allowed to listen to would be Wayne Newton and DC Talk.

Everyone finds some form of speech objectionable. There are things that offend me. But more often, these things are in the form of a personal attack, rather than a more general statement.

Even if 99 percent of people found a statement objectionable, that would not be justification for keeping one person from making that statement. Not if you’re advocating freedom of speech.

The idea of providing people with a freedom to say what they want is that even the most ridiculous opinion might have some validity to it.

Let’s set aside ridiculous speech for a moment. Really crazy stuff isn’t even the issue here. The real issue is the ludicrous notion of dangerous speech.

Dangerous speech is not only unpopular, it threatens the very fabric of our nation. At least in the opinions of the fascists who oppose it.

I alluded earlier to flag burning, and flag burning probably falls under this category. Flag desecration can represent any number of things, but most people seem worried about people who burn a flag as a way to say “Hey, this country sucks.”

Most people living in this country don’t think America sucks. But as I said earlier, even if 99 percent of the people agree, there is still no justification for preventing that 1 percent to voice its opinion. Not if you are an advocate of free speech.

There are all kinds of people in this country saying things that could be considered dangerous. Right now, there’s a guy out in Wyoming telling his brethren that the CIA, the blacks and the Jews are conspiring to take away their land.

That’s some crazy shit, and it’s just one example of the kind of not only bizarre, but militant and violent speech going on in this country right now.

But if, and only if, you are truly an advocate of free speech do you realize that it is important to protect these people’s rights as well.

Bein’ an advocate of free speech ain’t like dustin’ crops, boy. It’s a tricky endeavor.

If you undertake it, you need to realize that you will disagree with a good number of the people you stick up for. Not only will you disagree with them, but you may even be offended by them.

Maybe, like most God-fearing Americans, you believe Marilyn Manson is a scourge on society. I think he’s a hack who is only staying afloat because of those very people, but I would never prevent him from saying whatever he wants.

If Marilyn wants to tell all the pissed off middle-class Goth kids to kill their parents, more power to him.

Maybe you think the American flag is the ultimate symbol of the sacrifices of all the veterans in the history of this country. I would like to think they were fighting for something more than a cheap rag you can buy at Wal-Mart.

I’m not trying to change anyone’s opinion on the friggin’ flag desecration amendment.

But if you feel so strongly about our responsibility to protect Old Glory, maybe you should stop considering yourself a First Amendment advocate.

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Ben Godar is a senior in sociology from Ames. He is arts & entertainment editor of the Daily. He likes his effenheimer with a twist.