Daily Staff Writer

“Am I the only one addicted to Chap Stick?

Sophomore

Art and design

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“It would be more valuable for students to evaluate their own study habits than the strengths and weaknesses of instructors.”

Graduate student

Chemistry

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“Sex with animals? That’s no big deal. Tim and Lassie had that ‘Special Bond.’ So do Scooby and Shaggy. It’s only natural!”

Sophomore

Undecided

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“Whenever I feel a little down, I just visualize a fat guy falling on the ice. Then I feel better.”

Junior

Computer engineering

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“The only reason I’m an engineer is to get women.”

Freshman

Computer engineering

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“I wish I was a jerk so I could get chicks.”

Sophomore

Management information systems

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“There are two reasons why I won’t drink out of a toilet: number one and number two.

Sophomore

Journalism and mass communication

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“Everything I need to know about sex, I learned from the ‘Net.”

Freshman

Computer engineering

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“You can’t trust anyone over 30! They become brown-nosing, bureaucratic, bungling buffoons.”

Senior

Management information systems

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E-mail one-sentence Quick Es to [email protected]. edu with “Quick E” as the subject. Include year in school and major. All Quick Es will be anonymous.