Everyone knows “The Simpsons.” And everyone loves them.

Unlike some cartoon fads that only manage to make the world a dumber place (“Beavis and Butthead”), or characters that, God love ’em, are just getting old (“South Park’s” Cartman), “The Simpsons” continue to live on.

Not a soul in this free world ever seems to get sick of Bart’s twisted 10-year-old humor or Homer’s famous “Doh!”

Not to mention the mystery behind the infamous death of the evil Mr. Burns or the love/hate relationship between Krusty the Clown and the children of Springfield.

And where would these comical, yellow-faced characters be without the town of Springfield?

Although Matt Groening’s brainchild has been on the air for a decade now, some are just now tapping into the gold mine of comedy known as “The Simpsons.” For these formerly deprived souls, there is no need to fear.

Now, the editors of “Are We There Yet?” travel guides have brought the deprived a brand-new, up-to-date history book of “America’s crudbucket,” Springfield.

In addition to a historical walk through the city’s streets and landmarks, every famous resident of Springfield offers his or her own opinion on “What’s Right with Springfield.”

From 10-year-old Martin Prince’s love for the peaceful Springfield Arboretum to local merchant Apu Nahasapeemapetilon’s fondness for his “beloved place of employment,” the Kwik-E-Mart, all of the Simpson’s family and friends offer their advice for Springfield tourists.

Visitors are also given a helpful run-down on the best and worst places to visit.

Tourists are encouraged to stay away from the Krustyburger restaurant, because the “local populace has seemingly developed a resistance to the burger’s inherent bacteria and spirochetes.”

But praises are sung for the Maison Derriere, which delivers “far more entertainment for the buck than every other bar in town, provided you’re a heterosexual male between the ages of 18 and 80, with no shame and plenty of one-dollar bills in your pocket.”

Prime times to visit Springfield are also suggested, along with descriptions of all the hip annual events.

Hungry? Stop by the Springfield Chili Cook-Off — “an amazing day of ground meat, spices, hot peppers, and inhuman consumption of beer.”

Fun for the whole family can be found at the Do-What-You-Feel Festival, which one year involved “people celebrating the ‘owning of your okayness’ one minute and throwing neighbors through store windows the next.”

Finally, if travelers are still somewhat leery of the famous town, a survival guide is tacked on to the end of the book, featuring surgery survival methods courtesy of Dr. Julius Hibbert, M.D., and a feature article by El Barto himself, titled “Everybody into the Cool: A Kid’s Guide to Springfield.”

This newest Springfield installment is full of privileged inside jokes for every Simpson lover and much-needed historical info for new Simpson viewers.

If one Fox re-run a day isn’t enough to satisfy, don’t fret. Just carry the entertainment along.

4 stars out of five

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Kelsey Foutch is a sophomore in journalism and mass communication from Waterloo.