Daily Staff Writer

Quick E of the Day

“Who’s the black private dick who’s a sex machine with all the chicks?”

Senior

English

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“High priced books! Price fixing. Competition lowers prices, buy from Varsitybooks.com.”

Senior

Management information systems

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“Let’s all stop supporting the NBA until they make minimum wage, too.”

Senior

Management information systems

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“Why does love have to hurt so much … when I go to urinate?”

Junior

Sociology

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“Bring back the Dream! Long live Strama!”

Freshman

Business management

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“Does Student Services have a group for those suffering from ‘Textbook Sticker Shock?'”

Junior

Political science

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“To all the snowmen decapitators: Very uncool!!”

Junior

Zoology

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“I got the ‘Jesus tape’ so I could copy porn over it, wrap it and give it back.”

Sophomore

Pre-computer engineering

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“I think something is wrong with my ‘Jesus video,’ all I got was an old episode of ‘Murder She Wrote.”

Senior

Liberal arts and science

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“Jesus was way cool. He could turn water into wine and wheat into marijuana.”

Sophomore

Undeclared

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E-mail one-sentence Quick Es to [email protected]. edu with “Quick E” as the subject. Include year in school and major. All Quick Es will be anonymous.