Daily Staff Writer

“Christmas Caravan”

Squirrel Nut Zippers

If rocking around the Christmas tree is getting lame, you can always go retro this year with the Squirrel Nut Zippers’ “Christmas Caravan.”

This new album comes hot on the heels of last summer’s “Perennial Favorites.” And while that kind of schedule usually stretches creativity beyond the breaking point, this album is at least the equal to the last.

It puts a new spin on a couple of old standards and offers something a little different that you may not already have in your holiday collection.

For fans of Americana, the Squirrel Nut Zippers’ version of “Gift of the Magi” will evoke the feeling of doing Christmas “Little House on the Prairie” style. The song triggers memories not so much of childhood Christmases but more of Christmas celebrations long ago.

“Sleigh Ride” has been done over so hard by muzak that it would seem the old tune doesn’t have any life left in it at all. But this time around it really gets a jump start with a Dixieland jazz twist. The trumpets and banjoes play off of one another and make you want to swing around your tree.

The album has some blues to it as well. “A Johnny Ace Christmas” will be perfect for the family that is looking to start drinking at Christmastime this year. The muted electric guitars and the subtle honky tonk piano make for a low-down dirty yuletide.

“My Evergreen” is reminiscent of the World War II era crooners. The glockenspiel and the clarinet combine for a mellow effect on this one that will put you to sleep if you’ve had too much eggnog.

The acoustic guitar version of “I’m Coming Home For Christmas” is performed with sweet harmony and just a hint of the Hammond organ for the complete melancholy effect. This one will make you leave as soon as possible for home this semester.

Other tracks to note are “Carolina Christmas,” “Hot Christmas” and “Winter Weather.”

This album will make a great addition to any collection and, best of all, most of it will keep better than other holiday leftovers. It makes for good listening all year long.

4 stars out of five

— Greg Jerrett

“The Christmas Angel: A Family Story”

Mannheim Steamroller

Chip Davis has done it again — well, not really.

Don’t be mistaken, his newest addition to the Mannheim Steamroller Christmas collection, “The Christmas Angel,” still holds undeniable Steamroller magic.

The only problem is, it bears an extremely notable resemblance to the other three albums in the collection.

This might be because most of the songs on “The Christmas Angel” are stripped directly from the tracks of his previous Christmas CDs.

Favorites such as the celebratory “Joy to the World” and the mystical “Carol of the Bells” are two among many that were snatched for this album.

Davis’ only justification for offering recycled tracks is his incorporation of a Christmas story that is told throughout the album.

Both Davis and guest storyteller Olivia Newton-John take turns interjecting verses of the story during the course of the album, making it necessary for the listener to endure the entire album of old music in order to hear the ending.

The story itself, which was also written in verse by Davis, is a fairy tale about an angel who triumphs over an evil “Gargon” to give an entire village of children access to their Christmas presents.

Although fanciful and somewhat predictable, the tale possesses storybook magic that’s ideal for the Christmas season.

Other than a few snippets of repetitive filler music in between old tracks, the tale is all that makes the album worth listening to.

Next time Davis feels like telling a story over samples of his old music, he might be better advised to write a book.

1 1/2 stars out of five

— Ashley Hassebroek

“The Ultimate Lounge Christmas with John Jonethis”

John Jonethis

Nothing says Christmas like kitsch. And nothing says kitsch like “The Ultimate Lounge Christmas with John Jonethis.”

Christmas is supposed to be old-fashioned and corny, and John Jonethis makes you feel like you are in the middle of “The Charlie Brown Christmas Special.”

This album is packed with the classics: “Winter Wonderland,” “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas,” “I’ll Be Home For Christmas,” “White Christmas,” “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year,” “Silent Night” and many, many more.

There isn’t one track on the album that stands out and makes you say, “Wow, this is the best version of this song I have ever heard,” but there aren’t any songs which really stink either.

Of course, this is all based on a sliding scale considering that the entire album is like the lounge lizard’s Christmas, but classy.

It isn’t like listening to Frank Sinatra do these songs in the main room of Caesar’s Palace, but it is more like going to Vegas and seeing that the guy in your second rate hotel is actually much better than you thought he was going to be.

And if second rate is good enough for your family at Christmastime, then this album will fit right into your holiday plans. It makes you feel all “Christmas-y” in that plastic, middle-class way we all really want to feel like at the most holy time of the year.

So pour a couple more martinis for you and grandma, kick your slippers off and settle in next to the fire for a truly mediocre but warm holiday music treat.

3 stars out of five

— Greg Jerrett

“Home for Christmas”

N’ Sync

Guess who has a Christmas album out this year? That’s right, the lovable teen idols leading the boy band revolution that is N’ Sync.

The one word that best describes this record is cheesy.

Along with others such as the Backstreet Boys and the Spice Girls, N’ Sync is polluting radio and MTV, cluttering the list of groups that exclusively sing and don’t play instruments.

The computer-based music that backs up the singing is unbelievably corny.

Out of the 17 tracks on the album, only one song is actually worthy of being heard at Christmastime and won’t ruin your spirits — an a capella version of “O Holy Night.”

There is no denying that Justin, Chris, JC, Joey and Lance have great voices. Their singing of these classic Christmas songs is wonderful, but mix it with synthesized music and redundant drumbeats and it makes for a bad combination.

To top things off, at the end of nearly every song one of the guys utters “Merry Christmas baby” in a low and sexy voice.

If N’ Sync releases “O Holy Night” as a single, it would be worth checking out for the holidays. Just don’t waste your money on the whole record because it’s full of garbage that is intended to brighten your merry way this December, but it fails miserably.

1 star out of five

— Kyle Moss