Daily Staff Writer

Quick E of the Day

“Those who fail in life will not succeed.”

Junior

Journalism and mass communication

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“To the senior in mechanical engineering: Someone has to master our native tongue. God knows you haven’t.”

Junior

English

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“High, I M A Mehk-an-ickle Ehn-GIN-Ear hoo nehvuh gahtz A En-Glisch

Tee-chur azz A ked an’ luk howuh qool I is!”

Junior

Fine arts

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“Why can’t we just get these huge groups of crows put away for murder?”

Graduate

Physics

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“Leave it to an education professor to actually think that the iMac is good for anything besides an electronic clock.”

Senior

Computer engineering

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“What happened to the Menard’s guy? Is that his granddaughter doing those

commercials for him?”

Senior

Computer engineering

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“To the junior wanting a porno with a good plot: Go see the girl in Knapp having crazy, freaky, monkey-sounding circus sex.”

Senior

Computer engineering

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“Why don’t we just tell the vandals the DPS’s schedule rather than how often they come by?”

Sophomore

Mechanical engineering

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“The person I have the most respect for in this country is Kenneth Starr. By the way, I’m a Republican.”

Sophomore

Finance

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E-mail one-sentence Quick Es to [email protected]. edu with “Quick E” as the subject. Include year in school and major. All Quick Es will be anonymous.