Censorship is a great thing, isn’t it? I love the idea that true feelings, ideas and expressions should be closed off to you in order to make sure that you don’t wake up and actually start saying what you feel instead of merely thinking it.

I think it’s great that there are certain four letter words that the acting media will not let you read because all of you are too immature to deal with a colorful adjective that will provide true representation of emotions.

Let’s make all musicians sing about good times, love and personal gain. I mean, we all know that the world is just made up of good things.

None of us ever go through hard times or feel any angst or pain, so why should we ever express those feelings?

In fact, why don’t we all just make laws that won’t allow us to speak freely at all?

Maybe a law could be passed that would not allow men or women to hit on the opposite sex at a bar because it could possibly lead to a hot night of wild, nasty sex that would be performed out of wedlock.

And as we all know, knocking boots when you’re not married is a mortal sin and not a politically correct event to be involved in.

In fact, why don’t we just ban all drinking establishments? Heaven knows it’s not proper to get drunk. I mean, what does society think about drunk people?

On second thought, let’s just pass a law banning the human thought process. Nobody will be allowed to think on their own any more.

Instead, we’ll be spoon-fed someone else’s thoughts and ideas of what is right and we’ll all be forced to stand up for false beliefs.

That’s right.

That’s my dream.

I can’t wait for the day when a member of The New York Times kicks open my door, stuffs a sock in my mouth, bends me over and checks my oil. That would be awesome.

Isn’t this what the student body wants? Isn’t this what you want? Don’t you want all your media outlets to reflect popular opinion, or at least what the media tells you is popular opinion?

I’ll tell you what. The day I have to filter a column to coincide with an agenda filled with ignorance and baby talk is the day I take the campanile by rifle.

If that day comes, then we have already been put to sleep and no longer deserve the right to walk around carrying a brain that has been proven better served to watch “Mr. Rogers” than form a true opinion on our own.

Any form of personal expression is art. And art should have no boundaries, unless it be a caged expression.

All artists ask is that their art be taken for its value in so many words, whether it’s music, movies and yes, even columns.

There are many of you out there who understand what your rights are and believe in free speech. I would love to buy you all an Icehouse and a pack of smokes.

To those of you who don’t, I would rather you walk up to me and say “Thank you, Mr. Calek, for freeing my fragile little mind from its own pathetic walls of political correctness and giving me the strength to say that you suck, because without your words, I would have never had the power.”

Remember that hate and love are the highest forms of emotion, and if you have neither, then you’re just a pathetic drone working for the queen bee of sickness.

Say what you feel … not what they want to hear.

We’ll talk later.

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Chad Calek is a senior in journalism and mass communication from Persia.