In case you’ve noticed a guy about seven feet tall with a really red complexion and a pointed tail walking around campus carrying a flaming pitchfork, don’t worry. Hell has, in fact, frozen over and Satan has been evicted. I think it might have something to do with the events in Iowa City last weekend.

For a true ‘Clone fan such as myself, being in Kinnick this weekend was a truly religious experience. Several times I felt compelled to throw my hands up into the air and thank the maker that I was lucky enough to have scored a ticket.

But the true fun was not really in the game. Sure, it was one of the highest points of my life when I saw Iowa fans starting to file out of the stadium, but the minutes after the game were on a completely different level.

As the last seconds were ticking off the clock, Iowa City law enforcement began to create a line around the field over by the Iowa State cheering section. I prepared for the worst, expecting a DPS style clubbing for my efforts to get on the playing surface.

I was pleasantly surprised, though, when the peace officers simply guarded the hinged goal posts, which they let down with 12 seconds remaining. They were not concerned when hundreds of rabid ISU fans rushed to the fifty yard line to celebrate with their heroes. The officers just watched as we ran by like lemmings to the cliff.

And as I was sprinting out to the massive throng, I began to think. What if we had been in Ames when we (as in the players and I) won our first game over Iowa in a decade and a half?

As I was smacking Joe Parmentier on the shoulder pads, telling him how amazing he was when he scored the first and second rushing touchdowns of his career, I couldn’t help but think that I would be on the ground right now, struggling to get out of a pair of handcuffs.

When the traveling trophy was sent surfing through the crowd, I was happy that I wasn’t in Ames being escorted to a police car. Instead, I was becoming one of the first Cyclones to touch the trophy since disco was still not quite yet dead.

Then a couple minutes later, when I was heaving Darren Davis up on my shoulders (that was me on the front of the Big Peach), I had to admit that this was a lot better than trying to decide which one of my friends had the money and the loyalty to come post bail.

Long after the excitement wore down, though, I became depressed. Why in the world should I be happy that one of the most jubilant moments in Cyclone sports history happened in Iowa City? Shouldn’t I be wishing that this had happened on our home field in front of thousands of Iowa State fans instead of hundreds?

We all know what would have happened, though. It would have been just like homecoming last year. Our friendly neighborhood officers of peace beating the crap out of fans who had the nerve to rush out onto the field and then not run away when a cop told them to stop.

But that should not be. We should not feel scared in our own house.

For a long time I thought this was a DPS issue. I thought that they were the ones with the malignant power trip. However, I have reason to believe otherwise now.

On Sunday night, I had a conversation with a DPS officer about post-game celebrations. He basically said that although Public Safety doesn’t promote the breaking of laws, they love to see fans celebrate just as much as the next cardinal and gold-blooded individual.

In fact, he informed me that the incident at the Baylor game last year was something that DPS dearly regrets, and that it was an athletic department decision to try to keep students in the stands. He said that even though they were opposed to the decision, favoring a more passive approach, the athletic department insisted that their precious field and goal posts be guarded at all costs.

That confused me. The athletic department was the one that called the shots last year against Baylor? I guess it makes sense — it would be their call — but it still does not sit right with me. Why would the athletic department bite the hand that feeds it via donations and season tickets?

But on the other hand it gave me hope. If the decision did come from the athletic department, then it was easily reversible. I believe that last Saturday’s actions in Ames are reason to be optimistic. Although they wouldn’t let the deliriously excited students into Jack Trice (that’s understandable when the game wasn’t even held there), they did let them run off with a practice goal post. The exact words of one athletic department administrator were, “What were we supposed to do? They wanted to take something.”

With the new “indestructible” goal posts, there is no longer any reason not to let students down on the field.

Whenever we win a football game (and it looks like we might be doing it a little more frequently), it only makes sense that the students would want to mob the players. Any damage done to the grass can be replaced in a matter of minutes with a little sod.

And certainly it is worth it to keep the crazed football fans at this university happy. So I charge the athletic department: Lighten up and give us a break, because hell will soon melt — and then we’ve got nothing.

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David Roepke is a sophomore in journalism and mass communication from Aurora.