Adam Sandler’s ‘Wedding Singer’ spins round like a broken record

Mike Milik

Can you remember when the hottest color combination was turquoise and pink?

Or when Madonna wannabes ruled the mall? When acid-washed jeans were all the rage?

When CDs were new? Miami Vice? The Rubik’s Cube? Rhinestone studded sweaters? Boy George? The off-the-shoulder look?

If you do recall those things, and the year 1985 calls to mind fond memories, you’ll love the first 20 or 30 minutes of “The Wedding Singer.”

The movie starts out by setting the scene with plenty of ’80’s nostalgia as Adam Sandler, the singer of the title, does a cover of Dead or Alive’s “You Spin Me Round.” I could hardly keep myself from singing along.

After that, you can leave the theater, because the rest of the movie quickly descends into an absolutely inane plot where the laughs get farther and farther apart.

Adam Sandler’s Robbie falls in love with Julia, a waitress played by the cutest woman alive, Drew Barrymore. There’s only one problem — both are engaged to other people.

Given this set-up, you can probably write the rest of “The Wedding Singer” all by yourself. You know exactly where the story is going to go. Julia’s fiance is a jerk, but Julia doesn’t realize it. Ditto for Robbie.

There isn’t an original element in the entire movie. We know Robbie and Julia are meant for each other and they will eventually realize their feelings for each other, but some kind of misunderstanding will temporarily mess things up.

There will be a scene where one of them almost marries the wrong person, but things get stopped by the right person. We also know the two will end up happy, but stupid things will keep them apart for at least 90 minutes. The total predictability of the plot makes the movie very boring.

Stupid is the operative word here.

One question that comes up in movies like “The Wedding Singer” — why are these characters so freakin’ stupid? After all, everyone in the movie knows Julia belongs with Robbie.

Their friends all know. Everybody in the audience knows. Hell, at one point, even singer Billy Idol knows. (Maybe they grew up near nuclear waste.)

Of course, if the main characters figured things out too quickly the movie would only have lasted about 30 minutes, which would have been fine.

One problem may be Sandler himself. I’ve never been a big fan of him, but I’ve never really disliked him either. Sandler is best in small doses. I don’t think he has the star power or talent to carry an entire movie.

I know I’m pissing off legions of “Happy Gilmore” fans, but Sandler is more of a supporting type, like the wise-cracking best friend.

Most of the movie just isn’t very funny. On a scale between uproariously hilarious and not funny at all, “The Wedding Singer” registers at mildly amusing. You’ve seen the funniest scenes in the previews and on the commercials, like the old lady singing “Rapper’s Delight,” so save your money.

What the movie needed was more goofy singing numbers like the opening “You Spin Me Round.” Well, it needed that and some funnier jokes. And smarter characters. Oh, and a decent plot.

2 stars out of five


Mike Milik is a senior in advertising from West Des Moines.