Woo-hoo! We get to keep Veishea!” the campus cheers enthusiastically. “Our tradition will not die! Yeah!”

The Iowa State community breathed a collective sigh of relief Wednesday as ISU President Jischke announced that Veishea would continue.

(That is, if anyone actually thought he would discontinue it.)

So, Veishea will go on in 1998, with its only condition being no alcohol allowed.

Oh yeah, no problem. Everyone will give up alcohol for one weekend. Yep, that’s right, President Jischke. We won’t drink.

How can anyone on campus hear this and not start laughing?

There absolutely is no way Veishea will be dry, and everyone knows it. People will still drink as much as humanly possible; they’ll just do it in private.

Instead of “Veishea: The Biggest Party in the Country,” it now will be “Veishea: The Most Covert Party in the Country.” Big improvement.

There are two basic problems with Veishea that everyone seems to be ignoring.

First, Veishea is so far removed from its original purpose, it holds no meaning.

Does anyone here remember what Veishea used to be like? I don’t, because until coming to ISU, I had never heard of Veishea. But I’ve been told Veishea was a celebration of the colleges — a time to learn more about, and showcase, our university.

Before Veishea ’97, my first experience with the event, I was expecting something like that. You know what? It wasn’t even remotely close.

Of the people I saw on Welch Avenue Friday and Saturday nights, no one cared about showing off our school. Almost everyone was drunk. That’s what it was about. The biggest parties, the most drinking.

Will “officially” eliminating alcohol from Veishea change anything? I sincerely doubt it.

So many people I’ve talked with are going to drink anyway, it’s hard to believe this pledge was ever passed. The only people I know who have signed the Veishea pledge are people who don’t drink anyway.

I signed it, but I don’t ever drink, so abstaining during Veishea won’t be much of a problem. Has anyone who does drink on a regular basis signed the pledge?

But honestly, how can we expect people to take the pledge and stop drinking when the entire function of Veishea is a big spring party? The actual tradition of Veishea is the inebriation, not showcasing our school.

Case in point: How many people know what Veishea stands for? The acronym could mean anything to most ISU students. People don’t know because that’s not what’s important.

And second, the problem with Veishea isn’t alcohol. The problem on CAMPUS is alcohol. Alcoholism is running rampant at ISU.

I’m not really talking about the occasional Friday night parties (although I don’t see the fun in that, either.) I’m talking about the drink-until-you-puke, drink-until-you-can’t-remember-your-name, drink-until-you-fall-over events that happen all the time.

Here are some examples:

One night last year, a girl on my floor drank so much she couldn’t remember what she did or who she was with. Some of her friends decided to play a little joke on her the next day.

They had a guy call her up, pretending she had met him the night before. She believed it and was pretty freaked out until her friends told her the truth.

This situation was really funny. Everyone on the floor laughed about it and she felt gullible — ha, ha, ha.

Except it wasn’t all that funny. She put herself in a position where anything might have happened to her, and the next weekend she went out and got drunk again.

A guy from my high school joined a fraternity last fall, and he told me stories about how his frat brothers would start drinking at about 1:00 in the afternoon, skipping class just to get drunk.

I also talked to a woman who worked as a limo driver. She would drive sorority girls to out-of-town parties (so they wouldn’t get in trouble with their houses) and then back to the Mary Greeley emergency room.

The girls would go kicking and screaming to the hospital, even though they were in serious danger, because they didn’t want their parents to know.

These situations aren’t isolated events. They happen all the time. Kids of all ages (especially those underage) drink constantly, irresponsibly and dangerously. So why should Veishea be any different?

In proclaiming to the world that Veishea will be alcohol-free, we ignore the actual problem — we’re putting a Band-aid on a gaping wound.

Veishea has problems. Can we ever actually fix them?

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Sara Ziegler is a sophomore in journalism from Sioux Falls, South Dakota.