Once again, I find myself a slave to the computer trying to produce another column.

As a Lifestyles columnist I try to discuss all the crazy antics of the day-to-day life on this exciting campus. It just seemed that nothing happened this week that I could write about.

Just as I was beginning to give up hope a friend came over and said, “J.R. sometimes you just take what you can get.” At first the statement confused me, and then it seemed like a perfect theme for this week’s column.

After all, we are college students who, in the end, must deal with the decisions handed down to us and ultimately take what we can get.

It seems every time I see someone who reads this column and recognizes me as “The Ohio Guy” they always have countless ideas about what I should write the following week. They say write about this, or write about that.

As much as I would love to write about some of the exciting and sometimes lewd topics, I’m afraid that I am bound by some, but maybe not many, restraints.

You take what you can get.

It’s at times like these, when the ground is covered in snow and slush, that the statement means the most.

Cases in point:

Even as you traipsed to class yesterday in a single file line, because the sidewalk wasn’t cleared, staring at the ground because you couldn’t look up or the blowing snow was in your face, swearing endlessly about the idiots that did not call off class because they don’t have to try and navigate through this crap, you were happy you were not the first student that had to brave the snow and begin that narrow path that would be traveled throughout the day.

You take what you can get.

When you finally see one of those plow/brush things you hope that by the time you get out of class the sidewalk will be clear.

When you leave class you find that the one sidewalk you walk on still isn’t cleared but the brush truck is coming right now.

As it approaches you realize it is not going to slow down near the group you’re walking with, so you have to jump to the side and immerse yourself in nine inches of powder, getting sprayed with all the grime and sludge that comes off the sidewalk from the brushing. But you’re glad it didn’t run you over.

You take what you can get.

As you slip and slide your way to class on the mini-ice rink the plow has created, you focus hard while trying not to fall.

You watch painfully as people slide down hills and flail like fish trying to keep their balance. You’re so happy you made it to class without falling … this time.

Or you’re watching all of this as you cruise to class in your roommate’s car.

You take what you can get.

Tonight you’ll pack up your mugs and head to your favorite drinking establishment (or at least I will) hoping to drown yourself with a little mindless alcohol consumption.

You toss away countless amounts of money to the guys providing you with this serum for stupidity and bask in the elation of drunkenness.

You dance a little. You talk with some friends and then try to find Mr. or Mrs. Right, a long shot, but you feel tonight’s the night because the horoscope woman in the Daily said you were a 10 today, and damn it, you feel like a 10.

It’s now 2 a.m. and…

You take what you can get.

Then that person realizes you’re too drunk and too stupid so now you have to try and find a way home.

There is no way you’re going to walk because you almost fell down going to class and you can’t imagine the struggle it will be to get home now.

So you start to flag down people you think you know to give you a ride.

The only person you manage to get to stop with all your frantic waving is a member of Ames’ finest.

You take what you can get.

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J.R. Grant is a junior in journalism and mass communication from somewhere in Ohio.