Saturday morning, several people, including me, turned out for a school auction in Garwin, Iowa, for the chance to bid for old computers. A Commodore computer, some wiring and 24 Apple IIe’s were on sale along with several other items from the local district.

Needless to say, the participants saw the Apples as a way to save because today’s modern computers were too expensive. It was almost scary seeing people bid a few hundred dollars for a computer that was outdated before today’s fourth-graders were born.

In an attempt to poke fun of those “caring parents” who choose to give their kids a plastic shell with some wiring as an educational tool, I have developed a poor rhyme detailing some events from that day. Read at your own risk:

On Saturday, in Garwin, a small Iowa town, an auction was held drawing folks from all around.

Among the goods that included an oak desk, old Apple IIe’s found themselves on tables at rest.

One attending the auction may think, “How quaint,” whose 512 K memory was received without complaint.

People who gathered around there stared, yes they did; and said, “This would be a great Christmas gift for my kid!”

They pushed and they shoved until all goods were marked, then settled down on chairs to wait for the bidding to start.

A man with a really fast voice cried out loud, “These computers are good, but you must wait,” he said to the crowd.

The people they mumbled, but sat very still; as goods without prices were sold for many bills.

Then, finally it happened, the computers were next; and the bid it began at $1,000 — oh, you jest!

Of these old computers, we have no more need; except perhaps as a decoration under a tree.

“$500, then,” but nobody spoke; and the computers sat there like they may be a joke.

“They are! Well, they are!” you say of these Apple IIe’s; who once were much more than a decoration under a tree.

They had power, they had life, they were a modern sign of the times; and kids played Oregon Trail until they went blind.

“$175,” the fast-speaking man said while a bid card was raised; the old computers had worth for the first time in a decade!

“Do I hear more?” Well, yes you do: “I’ll give you $180, and my favorite shoe.”

“I’ll give you my horse and a barn,” someone cried; “and two-hundred dollars for a IIe without a drive!”

And so the morning progressed until all computers were grabbed; bidders were leaving and their children were nabbed.

Home they did go with their stuff in the back; their children unaware that the stuff really was crap.

The parents they wrapped it, it was tied with a bow; and placed under a tree away from the snow.

Six months from now when the newness has gone; the Apple IIe’s power switch will be off and not on.

And while these kids minds slow with obsolete rust; these computers will be in a closet gathering dust.

The moral is to buy first with thought and then buy for fun; don’t give our kids an excuse to be dumb.