I’ve been called a lot of things in my life.

Woman.

Daughter.

Athlete.

Writer.

Weird.

But I’ve never been called a Bozo.

That term is now officially reserved for the current President of the United States. At least according to Bob Dole and fellow Republicans.

In the 1994 election year, former president George Bush labeled Al Gore and Bill Clinton as “two bozos” who had less foreign expertise than a dog.

Most recently Dole told a crowd in New Jersey that “bozo’s on the way out,” referring to Clinton again.

All this negative attention aimed at the Bozo character is really irking the original clown, Larry Harmon.

Using “Bozo” as a derogatory term is “like attacking motherhood and apple pie, for heaven’s sake,” said Larry.

I don’t know about that, Lar. I think it’s kind of a deserving term for the president, at least this election year.

One thing to keep in mind though — clown shoes are awfully big shoes to fill.

However, when you’ve got a couple of clowns to choose from I’m sure the shoe will be a perfect fit.

And you can’t forget that all the campaign hoopla has been a virtual circus. First, one attack ad, then another… still another.

The debates were rather meaningless. Two guys standing up there telling their target demographic groups what they want to hear, of course, just to garner more votes.

No great revelations occurred. No great anything occurred.

The choice for the next President of the United States has come down to Ronald McDonald and Bozo the Clown.

But I’ve always been one who believed that if you fight for what you want and you try to make a difference, you will make a difference.

If you don’t like the choice between Tweedledum and Tweedledummer, find out who else is on the ballot.

There are other options than just Republican or Democratic parties.

Vote your conscience. Vote for what you want — what you stand for. No matter what or who it is.

Just make sure you are registered to vote.

That seems like a statement I shouldn’t have to make to college students.

I assume that most college students go to school to become educated and eventually make a difference in the world.

I assume that most college students wouldn’t think twice about whether to vote or not.

Of course, when you assume you make an (ass) out of (u) and (me).

Yesterday Jesse Jackson spoke on Central Campus to thousands of students about today’s issues, today’s candidates and the importance of exercising your right to vote.

He concluded his presentation by asking all those who weren’t registered voters to come forward so they could become voters.

I was shocked at the amount of students who sheepishly walked to the side of the stage.

Shock.

Especially because so many of those people were attending a Jackson speech and couldn’t even vote.

The number of people who attended the rally — 1200. The number of people who registered to vote — 210. There alone.

There’s a mere four weeks until election day on Nov. 5.

Even if Dole or Clinton don’t make it back to Iowa before the election, don’t fear because we’ve got our own “Bozo” right here in Ames.

Yep. It’s that guy I always see rollerblading in traffic down the middle of Lincoln Way. Ummmm… for some reason I just don’t think that’s too safe.

The other day I was heading to the commuter parking lot on the fabulous orange bus, I glanced out the Cy-Ride window, and stopped at the red light was “Bozo” waiting for the light to turn green on his smokin’ pair of blades.

Buddy, you can make all the car sounds you want to, but that doesn’t make you a car, even if you rollerblade wheels are as thick as the tires on a Geo Metro.

But seriously, in the words of Jesse Jackson, “Don’t sit by and do less than your best. Don’t wait for somebody else to do it.

“Don’t sit idly by. Your vote counts.”

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April Samp is a junior in journalism and mass communication from Eldora.